Illu$trious - Beyond Illusion lyrics

(Verse 1) You don't even know my true colours like some dinosaurs/ No one having faith in me like "Watchu grinding for"/ Things that used to bring me life now have me dying more/ The crowns never safe so watch out as I'm eying yours/ They sleeping on me, grieving on me, beefing on me, leaving on me/ Demons got me, creeping on me, breathing on me, leaching on me/ Greeting homies, bleeding for he, but all he ever did was leave on me/ And I'm only 15 years young so how come life isn't ever easy on me/ Started writing songs instead of d**h notes/ Learned that life could changed because it's not a set stone/ I'm pissed at love because every single frickin' day she doubts/ So I'm crying all these nights wondering if she even cares about me/ Parent mad at me because I'm in the studio day and night/ But I only do it because music makes it harder hating life/ She used to make me happy, he used to make me happy/ But now demons in my head have me asking what the hell is "Happy"?/ (Verse 2) Now these Natives supporting me just because of my race/ People hating me because of the complexion of my face/ I'm so hungry at the moment, just give me a taste/ They said that they loved me so what's with all of the hate?/ Young kid, that's done some dumb sh**/ Nothing turned to some one up sh**/ Graveyard shift, made hard hits/ Stay guarded, cause I've made hard shifts/ Sick of these guys saying that they got me/ Because they joined right in when everybody mocked me/ Can't breath, can't see, can't eat but no matter what happens any time I still can't leave/ Staying trill and speaking of the things that made me/ Because I come to learn I love music more than Em loves Haley/ I don't need to be real to you cause I'm real to myself/ I only did this music so I can try to start healing myself/ (Verse 3) I'm about to tear my heart out because I hear them under floors/ I guess I never should have gave you space like an underscore/ I took some pills, you did the same/ Except I woke up somewhat damaged and you didn't wake up at all on the next day/ You called me crying and left a voicemail on my phone/ But, I was being selfish and had some plans of my own/ Caught in the past while youtried to being me to the future/ And now because of that you're not alive to see the future/ You did same as others and pulled the plug on yourself/ I guess I should've stopped being concerned about me and watched out for your health/ I'm sorry that I wasn't there when everything faded into black/ So, I won't be mad when you're up there never watching my back/ And I can't give up because of that promise that I made you/ And I think I owe it to you because I wasn't there to save you/