Buckle up, sit down, my name is Joe Get on the gondola to heaven here we go When we get there what the hell We'll eat a pound of mortadella And dance the tarantella to and fro My Uncle Louie - He's a waiter back on Earth He likes basketball, He also likes the Nerf We'll shoot a hoop or two as we jump in this canoe Floating up the gondola to heaven 'Ats-a my boy, my Uncle Louie tells me 'Ats-a my boy, my Uncle Louie's proud You're just like your mother You've got the nose of your father 'Ats-a my boy, 'ats-a my boy, 'ats-a my boy Mange, mange, eat your antipasto Mange, mange, eat your provolone As we pa**ed the Milky Way Uncle Louie liked to say Mange, mange, mange, mange, mange, mange It's my job I navigate the gondola I use a pole the size of the universe We go around the black holes Watch your head on the meteorite All this work it builds up my appetite The Earth she's-a small like a meatball The stars all look like Parmesan cheese The tape deck blew a fuse Uncle Louie takes a snooze On the gondola to heaven Book a flight it's all right seats available tonight Buck up on the gondola to heaven We travel a zillion knots as we take jump shots Shoot a hoop on the gondola to heaven When we get there what the hell We'll eat a pond of mortadella, 'ats-a nice! Floating up the gondola to heaven