I'm the cop in a little bitty town And I don't get much pay Oh, but I caught seventeen out of state cars And four of my friends today Yeah, I let the hometown boys go home They paid five dollars bail Oh, but all the drivers in the out of state cars Had to go to jail Well, they hollered and they moaned And they cried and they groaned They all swore that they'd sue But the judge was high and so was I And we needed the money too Yeah, the judge and me got a deal You see we split the money fair Except for thirty percent to the county seat To keep the law out of our hair And old Charlie's working out real good Down at the corner store where the red light is He sees them out of state plates two blocks away And when they get right up on top of that green light Old Charlie pushes that secret bu*ton Underneath the corner d**tore counter That yellow light only lasts for a tenth of a second Oh, the county pays me about forty a week Ain't that the living end If it wasn't for them tourists in them out of state cars I'd have no look to spend But the way it stands this year so far I've made a hundred thou For a high school dropout I'm a doin' fine I make more than the president now, Of course he's honest So if you're driving down the road And flashing lights you see If they're on a top of a red Rolls Royce You can bet your boots it's me 'Cause I'm the cop in a little bitty town And I'd sure like to see All the drivers in them out of state cars Try to get by me