Heywood Banks - Trauma To The Groin lyrics

I love those funny video shows I just can't get enough The cavalcade of concussions Boy that's funny stuff They're tripping in Poughkeepsie They're slipping in Des Moines But the ones that win ten thousand bucks Are all trauma to the groin A trauma to the groin, boys, trauma to the groin Nothing's quite as funny As a trauma to the groin There is no wit more pretty There is no joke divine Or limerick delicious as A trauma to the groin Now Jacob was a small boy In a Tee Ball league And his father stood behind him Coaching to succeed The boy he swung with all his might You should have seen Dad's face When the bat connected 'Tween first and second base Oh, a trauma to the groin, boys, trauma to the groin Nothing's quite as funny As a trauma to the groin There is no wit more pretty There is no joke divine Or limerick delicious as A trauma to the groin We wanted to collect the check From those video fools So we taught our three year old The running headbu*t to the j**els Too bad we left the lens cap on the camera by mistake 'Cause grandpa weren't too happy About the second take Oh, a trauma to the groin, boys, trauma to the groin Nothing's quite as funny As a trauma to the groin There is no wit more pretty There is no joke divine Or limerick delicious as A trauma to the groin One day while in the garden, I stepped upon a rake The blow intense and accurate An impression it did make My children caught it all on tape Thought it was the funniest thing And I choked a curse out through my tears As they began to sing Oh, a trauma to the groin, boys, trauma to the groin Nothing's quite as funny As a trauma to the groin There is no wit more pretty There is no joke divine Or limerick delicious as A trauma to the groin Well, I won the money Though I fail to see the joke Hey, each to his own, I guess And most of the dough, well don't you know Paid the bill to the EMS So let us see a show of hands And let it be resolved That a trauma's much more funny If your own groin's not involved Oh, a trauma to the groin, boys, trauma to the boys Nothing's quite as funny As a trauma to the groin There is no wit more pretty There is no joke divine Or limerick delicious as A trauma to the groin