Harvey Schmidt - A Well Known Fact lyrics

[MICHAEL, spoken] Women, you see, are different from men. They look marvelous when they're young, but then when a woman achieves her matronly station, there begins a certain process of, well... deterioration. Now, just a minute, let me finish! It's a well known fact that a man is more attractive the older that he grows (sung) He's like a late October rose He's noticed everywhere he goes It's the strangest thing But a man is more distinguished As time starts sliding by Although I really don't know why I couldn't change it if I try Unfortunate... may be But changeable it's not Men of forty go to town Women go to pot It's a well known fact That a man is more attractive With each pa**ing year He gets more and more attractive And the girls react It's a well known fact! When a man is under 21, he is not worth a damn He thinks that he's a tiger, but he's really just a lamb He growls. He roars. He wears his trousers tight But he's like that no-good hound of ours: all bark, no bite! When a man is under 31, he's like domestic beer He has a certain body, but he doesn't have it here (Michael points to his head.) He wheels. He deals. He doesn't spare expense But he's like the national budget: all bills, no sense! But when a man is 41 He's entering his prime Delightfully witty, still he's wise For he's stood the test of time! [Dance break] It's a well known fact that a man is more attractive With each pa**ing year he gets more and more attractive And the girls react It's a well known fact!