Half Man Half Biscuit - Twydale's Lament lyrics

Indicate then you stupid ba*tard How was I supposed to know That you intended to go left I'm not a mind reader You shall be cast away into the fiery pit And in the fiery pit there are Eternal sleeping policemen I saw a young professional couple playing Poohsticks on a Cotswold bridge I watched them walk along the banks of the Windrush eating jasmine ice cream Before heading north to Warwick Arts Centre and Marianne Faithfull Splendid I picked up all the elastic bands dropped by the postman on my driveway And took them up to the pub on a Thursday evening As that's where he likes to go for the quiz He believes he is needed for the music round His friends obviously humour him Anyway, I place myself at a nearby table And whenever he tries to light up a cigarette I fire it out of his mouth with one of the elastic bands Which he finds most annoying Most annoying Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy When you've been arrested for defacing the bridge Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy When you've been arrested for defacing the bridge Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy When you've been arrested for defacing the bridge Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy When you've been arrested for defacing the bridge Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy When you've been arrested for defacing the bridge Gouranga Gouranga Yes I'll be happy…