Hailey B - Thoughts (prod. illthought) lyrics

[Verse 1 - Hailey B] I've never felt so lost before They say it's all in due time, I suppose But you never really know, how far you will go 'till you get with that one person That make you really wanna go, as far as you can There's no limit on the mind, illthought Small step for man, one giant leap for mankind But we don't look where we fall And half the time we fallen into a hole With no way to climb out, though and I'm really sorry it turned out this way I'm really sorry you began to feel some type of way So you fade away, and drive away, instead of being with me you'd rather ride a tidal wave or motherf**ing hurricane [Verse 2 - Hailey B] And now I guess everythings just gonna be gray I'm sorry it even hurts to me say But I can hardly get through the day My happiness has gone far away I don't even know if I'm okay I'm kinda just here breathing, not even really thinking, my mind keeps sinking and I keep drinking I hate alcohol but, it keeps me from reasoning with nyx who wants to k** a b**h Sick of existing, disappearing sounds so appealing I'll pretend to be kidding Sitting here wondering if any of you actually know what I'm thinking Suicide has never really left the mind of those who lied and claimed they were fine Its hard to see but theres always a fine line Rest in peace to Freddy E Where do you think I got the idea to add the B Its true, Hailey B is nothing without Freddy E Got Sca-Roll Anthem on repeat, rest in peace, please [Verse 3 - Hailey B] Sometimes sh** just doesn't get better You just gotta find a way to cope Until the day they take you out on a stretcher I swear to god the days I can't get myself together Are the days I regret, I just feel so under pressure Whoever tells me to just get over my depression Has never suffered, or ever felt oppression I'm gonna sound like a b**h, but that sh**s offensive I keep all my demons on the inside, but sometimes, when I cry, they try and creep and get a peek of the outside It's just so hard to hide A year ago, I never thought I'd see today Suicide, just so unsatisfied, I felt disqualified from life So, I'm sorry for the days I can't pretend to be happy Just know I'm still tryin' I've come a long way, I don't need your sympathy I've mastered the art of lying and Convincing you that I'm okay