Cut to exterior shot of a hilly San Francisco street. Johnny's car pulls up to a flower shop. Johnny enters the flower shop. Johnny: Hi. Florist: Can I help you? Johnny: (removing sungla**es) Yeah, can I have a dozen red roses, please? Florist: Oh hi, Johnny, I didn't know it was you. Here you go. Johnny: That's me! How much is it? Florist: It'll be eighteen dollars. Johnny: Here you go, keep the change. Hi doggy! Florist: You're my favorite customer. Johnny: Thanks a lot, bye! Florist: Bye bye! Johnny exits with the roses and gets in his car. Cut to Lisa in the room, talking on the phone. Lisa: Yeah, delivery. 555-4828. Half Canadian bacon with pineapple, half artichoke with pesto and light on the cheese. Thanks. She hangs up, and the doorbell rings. Lisa: Who is it? Denny: Denny! Lisa: Hey Denny, how are you doing? Denny: I'm fine. What's new? Lisa: Actually I'm really busy. Do you want something to drink? Denny: No thanks. I just want to talk to Johnny. You look beautiful today. Can I kiss you? Lisa: You are such a little brat! Denny: I'm just kidding! I love you and Johnny. Lisa: Okay, okay. Johnny's going to be here any minute. You can wait if you want. Denny: I gotta go. You'll tell him I stopped by. Lisa: Of course. Denny: Bye. Lisa: Bye, Denny. Denny exits. Cut to exterior shot of the house. Johnny's car pulls up. Johnny enters the room. Johnny: Hi babe. These are for you. (he presents a bouquet of roses) Lisa: Thanks honey, they're beautiful. Did you get your promotion? Johnny: Nah. Lisa: You didn't get it, did you? Johnny: That son of a b**h told me that I would get it within three months. I save them bundles. They're crazy. I don't think I will ever get it. They betray me, they didn't keep their promise, they tricked me, and I don't care anymore. Lisa: Did you tell them how much you save them? Johnny: Of course, what do you think? They already put my ideas into practice. The bank saves money, and they are using me, and I am the fool. Lisa: I still love you. Johnny: You're the only one who does. Lisa: At least you have friends. I didn't get any calls today. You're right. The computer business is too competitive. Do you want me to order a pizza? Johnny: Whatever, I don't care. Lisa: I already ordered a pizza. Johnny: You think about everything, ha-ha. Lisa: What's the matter? Are you alright? It's just a lousy promotion. You know what you need? You need a drink. Johnny: I don't drink, you know that! Cut to Lisa emerging from the kitchen with, it seems, scotch and vodka. Johnny: Ha-ha-ha-ha. She mixes them to form scotchka. Lisa: Don't worry about it. It's good for you. Johnny: You must be crazy. I cannot drink this. Lisa: If you love me, you'll drink this. She raises his gla** to his mouth and he drinks. Johnny: You're right, it tastes good. A-ha. Lisa: I know. I am right. Don't worry about those f**ers. You're a good man. Drink and let's have some fun. They drink. Cut to later, when they have had quite a bit to drink and Lisa is now wearing Johnny's tie as a headband. Johnny: Ha-ha-ha. A-ha-ha-ha. Mmm. Lisa laughs hysterically. Johnny drops and shatters a gla**. Johnny: You have nice legs, Lisa. Ha-ha. Lisa: (laughing) You have nice pecs. Johnny: A-ha-ha. I'm tired, I'm wasted, I love you darling! Lisa: Come on, make love to me. Johnny: Unhhh… Lisa: Come on, you owe me one. Johnny: I love you, Lisa. Lisa: I love you, Johnny. (she rips open his shirt) They make out on the couch, and then we cut to the bedroom for a lovemaking sequence that seems to be recut from their previous lovemaking sequence, but with a different terrible R&B song. Mercifully, it only lasts for about a minute. Cut to the famous “painted ladies” of San Francisco. Cut to the room. Lisa: So I'm organizing the party for Johnny's birthday. Can you come? Claudette: When is it? Lisa: Next Friday at six. It's a surprise. Claudette: Oh. Lisa: You can bring someone if you want. Claudette: Well, sure, I can come. But I don't know if I'll bring anybody. Oh! That jerk Harold. He wants me to give him a share of my house. That house belongs to me. He has no right. I'm not giving him a penny. Who does he think he is? Lisa: He's your brother! Claudette: He's always bugging me about my house. Fifteen years ago, we agreed, that house belongs to me. Now the value of the house is going up and he's seeing dollar signs. Everything goes wrong at once. Nobody wants to help me, and I'm dying. Lisa: You're not dying, mom. Claudette: I got the results of the test back. I definitely have breast cancer. Lisa: Look, don't worry about it. Everything will be fine. They're curing lots of people every day. Claudette: I'm sure I'll be alright. Oh! I heard Edward is talking about me. He is a hateful man. Oh, I'm so glad I divorced him. Lisa: Don't worry about it. You just concentrate on getting well. Claudette: Well at least you have a good man. Lisa: You're wrong! Mom, he's not what you think he is. He didn't get his promotion. And he got drunk last night. And he hit me. Claudette: Johnny doesn't drink! What are you talking about? Lisa: He did last night. And I don't love him anymore. Claudette: Johnny is your financial security. You can't afford to ignore this. Lisa: Yeah, okay mom. Can I just talk to you later? Claudette: You don't want to talk to me. Lisa: I just got done talking with a client, and I have to get ready to meet him. Can I just talk to you later? Claudette: Okay. I will see you later. Bye bye. Claudette exits. Cut to an exterior shot of the house. Cut to the room. Michelle and Mike enter, nervously. Michelle: How much time do we have? Mike: I dunno, uh, a couple hours? At least. Michelle: Well, let's have some fun. They sit on the couch and Mike opens a box of chocolates. Mike: Did you, uh, know, that chocolate is the symbol of love? Michelle: (laughing) Feed me. Mike puts a chocolate in Michelle's mouth and then makes out with her. He puts a chocolate on her chest and eats it off of her. Michelle: Yum! Mike: It's delicious! Michelle: Arms up! (she takes off Mike's shirt) Chocolate is a symbol of love. Michelle places a chocolate in Mike's mouth and then makes out with him. She starts to go down on him, although he begins reacting with comically exaggerated orgasm faces before she's in position to do anything. Cut to an exterior shot of the painted ladies. Cut to the room, where Mike and Michelle are startled by Lisa and Claudette entering. Claudette: Hello? What are these characters doing here? Lisa: They like to come here to do their… homework. Claudette: What homework? Lisa: Mom, this is Michelle's boyfriend Mike. Mike, this is my mother. Mike: It's a pleasure to meet you. Claudette: Mm. Michelle: Uh-huh. Mike and Michelle exit. Claudette: Unh. Oh, all that shopping wore me out. Denny enters. Denny: Hi Lisa. Lisa: Hey Denny. Denny, this is my mom. Mom, this is Denny. Claudette: How many people come in and out of this apartment every day? This is worse than Grand Central Station! Denny: I just need to borrow some sugar. Lisa: Help yourself, Denny. Denny: I also need a cup of flour and half a stick of bu*ter. Claudette: Doesn't your home have a kitchen? Denny: I'll come back later. Denny exits. Claudette: Tell me, what does Denny do? Lisa: Johnny wanted to adopt Denny. It's really a tragedy how many kids out there don't have parents. When Denny turned eighteen, Johnny found him a little apartment here in this building and he's paying for it until he graduates from school. Johnny really loves Denny even though he doesn't say it much. He's like a father figure to him. I told you, mom, Johnny is very caring about the people in his life. And he gave Denny his own set of keys to our place. Claudette: Please, don't hurt Johnny. Now if you really don't love him, so be it, but you should tell him. Mike enters. Mike: I forgot my, uh, book. He grabs a book but somehow this leads to Claudette holding his underwear. Claudette: What's this? Everyone laughs. Mike: That's nothing! Mike takes the underwear and exits as everyone continues to laugh. Claudette: Homework! Lisa: (laughing) Don't worry about it. Claudette: If I were a burglar, you would be my best friend. Lisa: Look, I don't want to talk about it. Claudette: You know I worry about you. I have to go home. Lisa: Okay, mom. Claudette: Bye bye. Claudette exits. Lisa: (sighing) Oh my god. Cut to exterior shot of the San Francisco skyline. Cut to the roof, where Denny is dribbling a basketball. This scene is in HD for some reason. Chris-R enters. Chris-R: Hey, Denny. Denny: Chris-R. I've been looking for you. Chris-R: Yeah, sure you have. You have my money, right? Denny: Yeah. It's coming. It'll be here in a few minutes. Chris-R: What do you mean it's coming, Denny? Where's my money? Denny: Okay. Just give me five minutes. Just give me five! Chris-R: Five minutes? You want five f**ing minutes, Denny? You know what? I haven't got five f**ing minutes! (he pulls a gun on Denny) I'm going to ask you again, Denny. Where's my money? Denny: I don't have anything. Chris-R: Where's my money, Denny? Where's my f**ing money, Denny? What'd you do with my f**ing money? Denny: I swear to god, it's coming! Chris-R: Where's my f**ing money, Denny? Denny: Put the gun down. Mark and Johnny enter. Chris-R: My f**ing money! Where's my f**ing money, Denny? Johnny and Mark grab Chris-R and disarm him. Mark points the gun at Chris-R like a G. Lisa and Claudette enter, or rather, they are suddenly in the scene without explanation. Lisa: What's going on?! Somebody help! Johnny and Mark haul Chris-R away amid indecipherable commotion. Johnny: Let's take him to the police. Lisa: Denny, are you okay? What did that man want from you? Denny: Nothing. Claudette: Oh, that was not nothing! Lisa: Tell me everything! Claudette: You have no idea what kind of trouble you're in here, do you? Denny: I owe him some money. Lisa: What kind of money? Denny: I owe him some money. Lisa: What kind of money? Denny: Everything is okay, he's gone! Claudette: Everything is not okay. Denny, that is a dangerous man! Denny: Calm down, he's going to jail! Lisa: Denny, what kind of money, just tell me! Claudette: What do you need money for? Lisa: Mom, please, Denny's with me and Johnny! Claudette: A man like that, with a gun! My god! Lisa: Denny, look at me in the eyes and tell me the truth. We're your friends. Denny: I bought some d** off of him. Things got mixed up. I didn't mean for this to happen. Lisa: (sobbing) Denny… Denny: But I don't have them anymore. Lisa: What kind of d**, Denny? Denny: It doesn't matter, I don't have them anymore. Claudette: It doesn't matter? How in the hell did you get involved with d**? What are you, giving them to him, selling them to him? Where the hell did you meet that man? Lisa: What kind of d** do you take?! Denny: It's nothing like that! Lisa: What the hell is wrong with you?! Denny: I just needed some money to pay off some stuff. Lisa: How much do you have to give him? Claudette: This is not the way you make money! Lisa: How much?! Denny: Stop ganging up on me! Claudette: Well it is time somebody ganged up on you, for god's sake! A man like that! Where in the hell did you meet a man like that? Denny: It doesn't matter! Claudette: It matters a great deal! A man holds a gun on you, you almost got k**ed, you expect me to forget that happened? Denny: You're not my f**ing mother! Claudette: You listen to me, boy! Lisa: No! Claudette: Somebody had better do something around here. Lisa hugs and comforts Denny. Johnny enters. Johnny: Are you okay, Denny? Denny: I'm okay. Johnny: Are you okay? Denny: I'm okay! Mark has materialized behind Claudette and Lisa. Claudette: What's okay? He's taking d**. Mark: Come on, stop, it was a mistake. Claudette: A mistake, that he takes d**. Johnny: Let's go home. Mark: Come on, it's clear. Claudette: What's clear? I am going to call the police. Lisa: Mom, stop, it was Denny's mistake, just stop! Mark: Let's go. Mark and Claudette exit. Johnny: Why did you do this? You know better, right? Why?! Denny: I'm sorry. Johnny: You know better, Denny, you almost got k**ed. Denny: I'm sorry. It won't happen again, I promise. Lisa: Denny, you know that Johnny's like your father. And we're your friends. We're going to help you. Johnny: Let's go home. Everyone exits. Cut to Mark on the phone with Lisa. Lisa: I miss you. Mark: I just saw you! What are you talking about? Lisa: I'm just wanting to hear your s**y voice. I keep thinking about your strong hands around my body. It excites me so much. I love you. Mark: Is Johnny there? Lisa: He's in the shower. Mark: I don't understand you. Why do you do things like this? Lisa: Because I love you. You just don't care, do you? Mark: I do care. But we agreed, it's over between us. Lisa: I understand, it's our secret. But I still have feelings for you. You just don't care. Mark: I do care! Lisa: I have to go now. I'll see you later, darling. Mark: Don't call me that. Lisa: Okay, bye. They hang up.