Gizmo (Rapper) - Deteriorating lyrics

[Verse 1: Gizmo] sh**t, I still miss my fam and my friends But I swear that most of all I miss my bro lil spence Whip tha Acura out Tha pad smokin Newport cigarettes I still think think about those times Little stress it was the best But, now I gotta grow up But I'm still wastin my money on green stuff to roll up You can eat my dick, if ya don't know us And I still ain't sh** but I ain't gunna slow up now Codiene, high - c, back woods fulla terps Im without a place to be Feels like I'm living in a dream But I'm missin the feelin of when I had you next to me girl Naw wait, f** every stupid b**h that twisted ripped my life ta sh**s That's a pain that Ill never forget I'm great, I could lie until I'm rich, if you granted me wish I wouldn't take that sh** cuz I never f**ed with my life, and there aiint a single thing That could make it all right Everyday I'm up all night, with the music in my head It's the only thing I like It's so hard to love me you don't wanna look at me I'm f**in ugly f** me let me disintegrate Deep into the soil and deteriorate [Verse 2; Barren] Before i say a word Please listen close this time I said this all before But Ive really lost my mind I know you're always worried My fingers looks so blurry Crossing over to a new world I love the way you look so lovely My self worth is so ugly I am absolutely nothing Contradicting thoughts Read back on the screen Makes no sense to me Its all a dream I can't be thinking these Dreadful thoughts about You and me I'm living in a void now Just testing all my patience With no one to try and say sh** Its just a statement That I'm making Please no mistaking