Garfield & Friends - The Garfield Rap lyrics

Meow One day I was asleep I heard a puppy yapping Can't stand dogs Who interrupt my napping So I went to have a chat with Odie Told the puppy dog he ought to hit the road He said, "No way" Tried to contradict me That was when the little puppy licked me Oh, how I want to kick and clobber When I get covered with doggy slobber But I was polite as I was able And I kicked the doggy off the table Landed on the floor, right in a heap Next time, he won't interrupt my sleep The guy I lived with got real sore I said, "Hey, what are puppies for?" Chorus: That's called being a cat (Lie around, get fat) That's what it takes to be a cat (Meow) That's called being a cat (Lie around, get fat) You'll be sitting pretty, kitty-cat Just last night I was having a snack And this guy comes in With a sackful of food He said it was really great Made for cats who are a little overweight Well, he persisted with his plan So I scoped the label out on the can Beef by-products is how they try To sell parts of the cow they can't identify Well, he said it was good for my waist And he forced me to take a little taste I thought the stuff that he brought home Tasted like ground up Styrofoam He gave me a bowl But I couldn't complete it I said "Hey, if it's so good Why don't you eat it?" Chorus Late at night I go out on the fence Down the street from my residence I bring my horn and I play a little jam Starting at 3:00, maybe 4:00 a.m People in the building Right across the way Get a special kind of treat When I start their day Is there any better one To start off all their morns Than the coolest cat With the hottest of horns? I play some jazz, and I play some blues And they offer tips in the form of shoes Come the morning They walk out on the street Lots of folks in their little stocking feet But I am pleased to make them all a deal Pays for a heck of a breakfast meal Chorus When I'm in the park People always want to pat The furry head of a kitty cat How many times have I heard it said "Oh, he's cute" as they rub my head? It was fun long ago But the fun's been fading I used to find the thing quite degrading Until I came up with a solution All I needed was A little financial restitution People pet me now and all is fine Until I show them the price list on my sign Pet the kitty on the head and neck I accept credit cards, cash, or check And next week our special rate begins For folks who want to scratch me Under my chin Chorus When I'm around Women make a beeline When they catch sight of this cla**y feline Saturday night I pick up my date That's the time we must celebrate Some guys are trouble, some guys are fun I'm Michael Jackson all rolled into one She has more fun than she's ever known Still, she'll yearn for that moment alone That's the moment that goes to the heart Then I smell something and quickly depart What's so important I'll leave her with ease? Homemade lasagna with plenty of cheese This is the end of The Garfield Rap Now pa** me a pillow, it's time for my nap Chorus (x2, excluding Garfield's lines)