Eric Schwartz - Psycho Ballet lyrics

So Lately you languish And angstful, you anguish For something to sweeten your day-to-day tea Your examine existence is rife with resistance You rot on the spot like forgotten kimchi So in an attempt to become un-vaclempt You are seeking diversion to lighten your day Well, when youre in New York Theres nothing a few dorks wont do To renew Your amused point of view When youre viewing the psycho ballet If your mind is as messy As old Herman Hessey And you dont have the dough for a concert or play Just come meet me there down in Washington Square And well take in the psycho ballet, ballet Well take in the psycho ballet Well sit ourselves down on a nice afternoon Ill point out performers and let you lampoon There sure aint no dearth of galoots on this earth But theres some here that hail from the moon Like the nuthouse-kateers and the brown-baggied beers Drunk by drunks who have drunk here for 25 years The comatose stoned boys and hip-hoppin homeboys With blasters abusing our ears Theres a pan-handling prophet Who swears hes been off it Since early last year or perchance yesterday Yes, the bullsh** will fly and youll laugh til youre cryin When spyin the psycho ballet, ballet When spyin the psycho ballet And now pervert observing would not be complete Without finding something disgusting to eat The stonerkabob is a constant surprise But McDougalls too far and right before your eyes Youve got knishes of cardboard And pretzels of paste That the Jersey boys barf when theyre face-down and faced But if thats insufficient, theres peddlers proficient In ways of enhancing the taste No, there wont be no ushers But plenty of pushers To service your every weed, every day Though the bar isnt open Its dope to be dopin When scopin the psycho ballet, ballet When scopin the psycho ballet Ganja, ganja Smoke, smoke Ganja, ganja Smoke, smoke Ganja, ganja Smoke, smoke Ganja, ganja Well Youve got bell-bottomed beauties In swell-bottomed splendor And frat boys whove blown it for the rest of their gender Tickertape traitors who blew it on blow And resemble Garcia without all his dough Youve got camcording tourists And Jesus freak jurists And pud-pounding purists on pisshouse patrol Mohawked marauders and brain-dead skateboarders Who dont seem to mind running straight into poles Well, therell always be accolades For spandex on rollerblades And losers in Lennon shades with nothing to say Theres no need to go formal A T-shirt is normal When viewing the psycho ballet, ballet When viewing the psycho ballet Ladies and gentlemen, please remain in your seats, the show aint over yet! Youve got guys wholl set fire to themselves for a quarter And girls who unshod would be eight inches shorter Bozos on benches who bobble their bo*ers And bimbo, babe bowzers who act like their owners Egos who masturbate with their guitars And seduce teeny-boppers convinced that theyre stars But when the girlies are gone, they are just as alone And neurotic as they were before Aint your surest chagrin The asylum youre in Is gonna start to make sense in the scariest way And when the bizarreuns Have ceased to seem foreign Youll star in the psycho ballet, ballet Youll star in the psycho ballet