Eddie From Ohio - Monotony lyrics

Well, we're making conversation It's one-way communication As you chat next to the side of me And I'm working on a theory That your thick barrage of queries Makes me wish for a lobotomy And I have a deep suspicion That your constant repetition Means you have no working memory And I know I'm not much better But I wish I were unfettered Cuz I need to have variety And then somebody drives up the sidewalk The car heads straight at me I would only welcome a collision If it just would break monotony (just break monotony) monotony (if it just would break monotony) Well, we're glaring at the tv And it's Regis and Kathy Lee They're a foghorn and a smiley face But today's a boring panel So we go and switch the channel And we're calling this a change of pace Well then there's Oprah & there's Liza And Sally Jesse Raphael Who are crying and beating men There's The View and good old Rosie Who are gossipy and nosy And they laugh at the expense of men And if someone would fire a missile And aim it straight at me I would only welcome detonation If it just would break monotony (just break monotony) monotony (if it just would break monotony) Well my job's a cracker-salter I work hard and never falter As they come down the conveyor line Those crackers I do salt them But my bosses I must fault them 'cause they never pay me overtime And it's cracker after cracker Heading toward the cracker stacker I take caffeine pills so I never tire It's like sorting daily mail Where there's never room to fail And one day I think I'll open fire Don't you know that it's the same job Same home Same red welcome mat And then there is the treadmill rusting in The space it's at It's where I hang coat and hat That's probably why I'm still fat We eat only meat and taters And we undertip our waiters For desert we share a derby pie Then we rent a motion picture And become a sofa fixture I say the film's okay but I lie Our life seems to be modeled After prose on shampoo bottles Where they say to lather, rinse and repeat Well we're latherin and rinsin And for me it is convincin That I'm getting much to tired to repeat And oh thank goodness here comes the chorus A varied melody I would only welcome variation If it just could break monotony (let's break monotony) monotony (if we just could break monotony)