Dirty Dike - Me & You lyrics

(Verse 1 - Dirty Dike) You're talking out your arse, I'm talking out my mouth You're squarking out your bars while I'm walking out the house And I don't make the rules, I just play the game And I won't bring my balls for no shameless bit of fame You're sniffing up your ket, I'm sniffing up my coke But I ain't gonna magnify the difference in a bloke You're living off the dole, I'm living off my soul And I don't wanna b**h about the system when I'm old I'm gonna buy some land, you're gonna buy some d** You're gonna find a slag while I'm gonna find some love You're smoking on a dick, I'm smoking on a spliff You're showing off your kids and I'm a chauvinistic pig You're ringing up your mum, I'm drinking with your dad He's pissing in the street while he's fingering a slag You're living in a dream, I dribble in my sleep You're looking in the mirror while I'm spitting to this beat You're going to the fair, I'm going to the shops You ain't gonna hear my f**ing album 'til it drops You're pissing in a bog, I'm pissing in a bush You listen to the trickle, it's a mission to the woods You're combing your hair, but nobody cares I'm a scruffy f**er but my omen is rare You're over-prepared, I'm casually lax I'm sat in the back of a taxi relaxed And I don't wanna prang, I just wanna chill When you just wanna hang around with slappers eating pills I just wanna f**, you just wanna wa*k Ladies and gents give a very big thanks and a round of applause Man, you're a nause I don't wanna hang around with mans any more You're trying to be my friend, I'm trying to be a dick You're trying to make it stick while I'm trying to get rid (Verse 2 - Jam Baxter) I'm straddling a pig, you're a maggot in a wig You've gone and bought your whole smackwagon to the gig, why's it matter who I'm with? You're chatting to a twig You try and spit a verse and end up fracturing your ribs And I don't wanna judge, you're on a lot of d** And yeah I know there's one thousand ways to hold a grudge But me I'm trying to speak, you're just trying to preach My ears about to stab itself and drink a pint of bleach You're talking to a child, I'm talking to a dwarf With 5 drops of acid in a nice warm sauce But you're doing what you can, I'm doing what you can't You're stuck being who you are, my whole crew's who you aren't Backflipping to the past I'd return with a gun You'd return with a badly drawn picture of your mum You're staring at my crotch, I'm try'na have a cotch Spent the last 5 hours staring at my watch Man I just wanna leave, you just wanna grieve I'm long past hearing about the sh** that you believe See I turn up to The Shoobs, you turn up in a bush Last seen s**ling the virgin in the woods Man I just wanna lounge, you just wanna scrounge I got a pair of creepy little eyes I can gouge And I'll hand 'em to you, have a chat with your crew I bowl around free, you're entangled in glue Gluey hands of a nonce, you're banned from the swamps I'm try'na cook an egg, you're a cancerous ponce I'm living on the edge, you're living in a hedge I'm try'na make an album, you're try'na make a wedge I'm calling you a chief, you're calling the police I'm trawling in the street and you're absorbed in the mystique I'm working for myself, you work for someone else You watch the world turn while I watch the world melt Shut up!