David Lindsay-Abaire - I Know It's Today lyrics

[Young Fiona] Settle in girls, it's story time! There's a princess In a tower Oh my gosh, that's just like me! Poor Rapunzel Needs a haircut But the witch won't set her free She pa**es time by singing Like someone else I know As years go by she sits and wait As years go by? Uh oh A torturous existence I don't remember this part! She wishes she were dead? Skip ahead! Skip ahead! But in the end Rapunzel finds a millionaire The prince is good at climbing And braiding golden hair! So I know, he'll appear Cause there are rules and there are strictures I believe the storybooks I read by candlelight My white knight, and his steed Will look just like these pictures! It won't be long now, I guarantee! Day number... Twenty three I know its today I know its today! [Teenage Fiona] Oh here's a good one! It's a cla**ic! There's a princess In a coma Glad its her instead of me Pretty maiden In a gla** box How I wonder does she pee? Blah blah blah, poison apple Boring boring, evil queen Filler filler, been there, read that! Seven shorties on the scene Skip ahead, skip ahead! But in the end the princess wakes up with a start The prince is good at kissing And melting Snow White's heart! So I know, he'll appear And his armor will be blinding! As shining as his perfect teeth And manly hose He'll propose On one knee And our pre-nup will be binding! About time we set the wedding date! Day number nine hundred and fifty eight I know it's today He'll show up today! [Fiona] There's a princess! Any princess! Take your pick, they're all like me! Not exactly, I'm still waiting! They're living happily Ever after better get here I want love in seconds flat! No one needs these middle bits Oops, did I do that? Cut the villains, cut the vamping Cut this fairytale Cut the peril and the pitfalls Cut the puppet and the whale! Cut the monsters! Cut the curses! Keep the intro! Cut the verses! And the waiting! The waiting! The waiting! The waiting! The waiting! But I know, he'll appear Though I seem a bit bipolar... And I'm a vandal now as well, though he won't mind I'm a find, I'm a catch And a very gifted bowler! It won't be long now, I guarantee! Day number... Are you there god? It's me Fiona [All] It's me Fiona! So I know, he'll appear Cause there are rules and there are strictures I believe the storybooks I read by candlelight My white knight, my night and his steed Will look just like these pictures! It won't be long now, I guarantee! [Young Fiona] Day number twenty three [Teenage Fiona] Day number nine fifty-eight [Fiona] Day number eight thousand, four hundred and... Twenty three [Young Fiona] I know it's today, oooo! [Teenage Fiona] I know it's today, oooo! [Fiona] I know it's today, oooo! [Young Fiona] I know it's today, oooo! [Teenage Fiona] I know it's today, oooo! [Fiona] I know it's today [All] I know it's today!