Dane Cook - Abducted lyrics

I've always wanted to be abducted by a UFO Yeah sometimes, I just go hang out in the woods Im just waiting for that blue light (UFO noise) AHHHHHH Thats how they s** you up, by a beam of light They s** you up by your chest. and thats not nessecary Through a rope ladder down, I'll climb up I'm interested, I'm here for you Don't s** me up by my chest, that hurts Ou're a hovering craft Why wouldn't I come in and poke around for a minute It would be great to be abducted, what did you guys do this weekend? Dude we got hammered, it was awesome Oh yeah, I was abducted. I was zippin around the galaxy. haha Sometimes if I think about, if UFO's come down I get a little concerned because then I thought this scenario This would be the altimate, full circle, slap in the face of the united states What if this happens, because look, we're the greatest country on earth But we get a little co*ky from time to time... If we don't like the way your country is doin its business We'll kick the door in, (door noise) Hey, hey, knock it off, you're buggin the world, cut it out And if you don't listen to us, well through all kinds of weapons And crazy sh** at 'cha... Which we always apologize about using 20 or 30 years later Listen we're really sorry about that, we were a little drunk at the time And we got a little rambunchous. the bomb We didn't know it was gonna do that We thought it was a contained blast and we didn't know It would make everything blow into smitherines... And you were being kinda a b**h, country, country You were being kinda a b**h Are we cool now? Do you mind if we leave 3/4 thousand toops and Maybe some supplies here You dont mind that do ya? DO YA MIND??? You wouldn't want us to get drunk again would ya!? High five us, photo op, (CHING) We get a little ha, we get a little co*ky, what if this happens, oh my god What if this happens What if the mother ship, (booooooom) comes over middle america And we're all sitting watching tv All the news crews are focus'd in and were sitting there watching What if when the hatches finally open (chaaaaa) Outta the UFO's come thousands of 100 foot native american indians?! We're gonna be watching like.. fu*k those are huge indians Please tell me there not giant indians, god damnit there huge indians Alright good game america, we had some fun huh? Hi giant indians, we did some sh**...and...uhhhh....ah aha ha .....could you show us how to make giant corn!!??