Following total atomic annihilation It may fall to you to save the great nation That's why Vault-Tec have made extra preparation And are proud to present you a special education Regarding aptitude You are an absolutely Unique amalgamation of attributes Now it's time to find out in which you excel What makes you S.P.E.C.I.A.L.? [Hook:] You're special! You're special! You're special! Oh so special! S.P.E.C.I.A.L Spells out that you're quite swell! Strength! Supplies are sparse So on seeing something sweet Be sure to scavenge, or starve The stronger you aren't, the smaller the stack Of scrap, storage and snacks That you can haul on your back But do be sure to stay on track of the numbers Or a savage could suddenly strike as you're over-encumbered And should your special self have such a regrettable incident You'd better get swinging any suitable weapon or implement Perception! Post-nuclear places Are pretty prearranged To put you through your paces Pinpoint the parts of predators that plan to prey With the Vault-Tec Assisted Targeting System Hooray! You may need to pickpocket Pinching for your own protection Practicing your pilfering Purloining to perfection If your preferential predilection's Petty theft of peoples' possessions You'll be protected by perception [Hook:] You're special! You're special! You're special! Oh so special! S.P.E.C.I.A.L Spells out that you're quite swell! Endurance! Epidemics are endemic everywhere Infection, amputation, radiation, never rare End the negative effects, refresh your energy By eating everything Even extra limbs and enemies Your belly's not ever empty There's endless entrées Extend the length of time you exercise Eons, days Escape encounters with louts and rowdy hooligans Or environments ensure you'll eventually be food again Charisma! Communists conquered this clean continent And concomitantly corruption was the consequence As such, you must be confident And cognizant of compliments Confirming that commercially you're consummately competent Convert companions to confidantes Convincing them to change a cuddly toy For cutlery and condiments Swallow down countless cups of co*ktails And charm your way from harm, chum Combat curtailed [Hook:] You're special! You're special! You're special! Oh so special! S.P.E.C.I.A.L Spells out that you're quite swell! Intelligence! Is idiocy inverted Innate instinct Take information and interpret it The inner intuition and initiative To impliment inventive ideas To be inquisitive It is indicative of ingrained imagination To take an inspiration and create an innovation Insure against injury through investigation Because ignorance induces incapacitation Agility! After all the aggro Antagonists are all too available There's no ASBOs Accelerate your acts of accurate aim And have any angry adversaries aptly aflame Avoid adverse a**aults from automatics Avert or annul their action with acrobatics Agility! Amazing adaptability Awesome! What an absolutely ace ability [Hook:] You're special! You're special! You're special! Oh so special! S.P.E.C.I.A.L Spells out that you're quite swell! Luck! The lady That lowers the likelihood of life's lotto's loss for the lazy When you're larking with lice That are larger than life At least you'll have the lethal last laugh and the like The lie of the land's less than lavish and lovely But when looking for loot you'll locate lots of luxury Loads of little lowlifes leering at your luggage? A lone laddy's liable to let them learn what luck is Congratulations, you've pa**ed the test Yes! From everyone at Vault-Tec Splendid work on your success Give yourself a pat on the back And maybe shake hands Then perambulate into the haze of the wasteland War War never changes Look at the history book's torn up pages Cause when the dust settles after all out war You'll be glad we taught you what to deal with fallout for [Hook x2:] You're special! You're special! You're special! Oh so special! S.P.E.C.I.A.L Spells out that you're quite swell!