Dan Avidan (and Ninja Brian/ Brian Wecht) NSP - Samurai Abstinence Patrol lyrics

[Verse 1: Danny Sexbang] In the tall skyscrapers of ancient Japan Lived two great warriors, a dude and a man Who proclaimed no s** until you are married They were Arin Neverbone and Samurai Barry 500 years later, two heroes were born One clothed in blue spandex, the other in scorn They were Ninja Sex Party, they had but one quest: To bring s** to the ma**es, 'cuz that sh** is the best In a super-hot orgy with ten girls and a mime Danny thrusted so hard he ripped a hole in space-time Each hump could be seen in the ancient night sky Graphic shots of Dan's nuts were in healthy supply Arin and Barry knew they had to act fast They jumped through to the future 'cuz they were dicks from the past They landed two feet from where NSP was rocking And screamed "Danny, it's your co*k that we now will be blocking!" [Chorus 1:] Samurai Abstinence Patrol To control all our junk is their one true goal It's a battle for bo*ers and rock and roll Ninja Brian will stab them in the soul (And the face!) What could this mean for Ninja Sex Party? Will our heroes be stopped from their boning spree? And will Danny get first place in his spelling bee? The championship word is "nomenclature!" Uh... N... O... C (buzzer noise) fu*k IT! [Verse 2:] The orgy ground to a halt and they took it outside The girls just went home, the mime probably died Brian ran at Arin while Barry started screaming Could we really have a future in a world without creaming? All hell broke loose with the insane war cry Arin soared through the air. Apparently, he can fly Danny french-kissed a girl like he was king of Versailles Brian stabbed some random guy with a different guy The battle raged on 'til the city was wrecked But the two sides began to have mutual respect "God damn," Arin yelled. "You must sure love to slam" "You don't even know," said Danny. "That sh** is my jam" A union was formed between both rival camps And they both started rocking using NSP's amps But the cease-fire ended and the battle resumed 'Cuz Danny whipped out his nuts and the alliance was doomed [Chorus 2:] Samurai Abstinence Patrol Now their tale will be pa**ed down in sacred scrolls They were voted "Most Douchey" in a recent poll Independently-conducted by Danny and Brian Is the story over or has it just begun? Has the battle for boning been lost or won? The question is a deep and important one Just like how in God's name do you spell "nomenclature?!" Here we go... N... R (buzzer noise) This is literally f**ing impossible!