My head's a parliament, I've got a whole debate going They poke, they prod, they're picking on me I've got noise upstairs, I can't participate I'm gonna call the pigs on my own party Am I a schizoid or a schizophrenic? When I ask my beam I'm both I've got whistles, bells I've got a stock car race going What I thought's a stick is an automatic When they gave out brains Yeah, I got screwed There's two kinds of fool I'm Both My right brain shaves, my left wears a dress I'm a cop, a snitch, a dick, and a**hole But the girl's approve, my friends all think it's great You see, I'm not nuts, I'm complicated I sh** outside I sleep in stores I'm between floors I'm both My heads an empty lot It's easy to find a spot Any God damned thing can park there It's twice the work And half the fun I'm formed, I'm done I'm both They paint the walls And spray for bugs But it's in my blood I'm both The doc says, "You! Who are you talking to? Hey!" I said, "Can't you see that I'm busy?" He shakes his head, and then he checks his watch again He yawns and writes out my prescription I take three of these And six of those But when I run low I'm both