Chumbawamba - A Man Walks Into A Bar lyrics

A man walks into a bar, he says, "Give me a Bacardi and Coke!" The Back o' Beyond Repair welcomes the broken and the broke Blather hitches a ride on the back of second-hand smoke And the man, well, he'll be the punchline in someone else's joke I'll beat this drink, it's a habit I'll kick Please help me now, I'm gonna be sick Something hit me, I wound up on the floor Damn this Bacardi, I don't want any more A man walks into a think-tank full of hooch and future sales Mixing wish lists with extention plans re: Guantanamo jail Smell the solid beech, and a whiff of cannot fail And a gilt-tray chock with goblets dripping cut-throat co*ktails And they drink a toast to Florida and all its air-conditioned hum And they damn the health of Cuba and they damn its bona fide rum He s**s a kalamata olive, spits out the stone And he mimics crushing people between forefinger and thumb I'll beat this drink, it's a habit I'll kick Please help me now, I'm gonna be sick Something hit me, I wound up on the floor Damn this Bacardi, I don't want any more The first man wakes up in the same bar, but it's different, as in a dream In fact it's someone else's dream, clean sheets and new regime Fidel burns as Nero roams, "Give the bar a zip code!" "See you..." "Si... C.U.", and it's one more for the road I'll beat this drink, it's a habit I'll kick Please help me now, I'm gonna be sick Something hit me, I wound up on the floor Damn this Bacardi, I don't want any more