Chris Farley - Tommy Boy - A Desktop Demo lyrics

Uh, what my a**ociate is trying say is that, uh... Our new brake pads are really cool. You're not even gonna believe it. Like, uhm, let's say you're driving along the road with your family. (He picked up a model car) And you're drivin' along, la-de-da, woo. Then, all of a sudden, there's a truck tire in the middle of the road. And you hit the brakes. EEEEEEEEE! Whoa, that was close. Ha-ha. Now let's see what happens when you're drivin' with the 'other guy's' brake pads. You're drivin' along, you're drivin' along, and then all of a sudden, the kids are yellin' from the back seat: 'I gotta go to the bathroom, Daddy!' 'Not now, damn it!' Truck tire. 'EEEEEEEE! I CAN'T STOP!' (He slammed the model car into a lighter) 'HELP! There's a cliff! AAAAAHH!' And your family's screamin'. (He set the model car on fire) 'Oh my God, we're burnin' alive!' 'No! I can't feel my legs!' Here comes the meat wagon. (He imitated a siren sound) And the medic gets out and says: 'Oh, my God!' New guy's in the corner pukin' his guts out. (He imitated a puking sound) All because you want to save a couple extra pennies. Ha, ha. And to me, it doesn't... (GET OUT!)