I'm not really in love with anyone But sometimes I like to pretend That Hayley G Hoover is my girlfriend She lives all the way over in america And we don't share the same political views But as far as hypothetical girlfriend's go She'll do Hayley G Hoover is s**ing up my heart She'll store it in a flask and she'll keep it forever Hayley G hoover, she is quite a mover Her videos are good And if after hearing this song you're considering going and watching them Then I reckon you should I met her IRL one time And she was pretty nice But when I meet her in my mind She does much more than just suffice She's the perfect woman more or less Though less is more but i digress She's the perfect girl for me Though, not really Hayley G Hoover is hoovering up my love And she'll store it just above where she put my heart Hayley G Hoover she's cuter than a goofer Her videos are neat And if after hearing this song you're considering going and watching them Then then that'd be greet Hayley G Hoover (Hayley G Hoover) Hayley G Hoover (Hayley G Hoover) Hayley G Hoover (Hayley G Hoover) And I know that I'm not Bo Burnham but I hope I'll do ‘Cause I want to spend all my days fantasising quietly and you and me and me and you The Wine Kone's got nothing on me I'm a bigger creep than he'll ever be Because I want you inside of me Though I only mean that mentally I'm not really in love with anyone But sometimes I like to pretend That Hayley G Hoover is my girlfriend