[Verse 1] Silver teeth and the co*kiness of James Dean Body like a cantaloupe, head like a baked bean No gun but he gets pretty irrate So if you run then you'd better learn to fly mate He spends his mornings tackling evaders And daydreaming that they issued him a taser And if they did, all the money he could save 'em With concession cards and bodies on the pavement And you might joke he takes his job too seriously But you don't know all the things he's seen There's a lot of gum under the seats (and people's feet) And you might joke he takes his job too seriously But you don't know all the things he's seen There's a lot of punks who ride for free (and retirees) [Pre-Hook] But in high school, he took two lessons in Jiu Jitsu And he was pretty good at it... I guess [Hook] Hey, hey please don't go and Go and throw your life away Don't you don't you run from him Son cause he'll f** up your Day, No he's not gonna Waste his time taking your name Trust me there'll be no escape He's got two feet and half a brain [Verse 2] This dude's like Paul Blart: Mall Cop If he lost his segway and had a small... Stop what you're doing if you see him with his badge on Though Jane at the office spelt his name wrong He doesn't have a baton, doesn't have a mad dog Doesn't know a lot of stuff but he throws a fat punch His mum packs his lunch, taught him wrong from right Saving the world one ticket at a time And you might joke he takes his job too seriously But you don't know all the things he's seen Sometimes children ride for cheap (or talk loudly) And you might joke he takes his job too seriously But you don't know all the things he's seen There's a lot bums up on these seats (and sometimes feet) [Pre-Hook] But in high school, he was one of the members In the runner-up 4 by 100 meter relay team. He still polishes his medal [Hook] Hey, hey please don't go and Go and throw your life away Don't you don't you run from him Son cause he'll f** up your Day, No he's not gonna Waste his time taking your name Trust me there'll be no escape He's got two feet and half a brain [Bridge] They wouldn't let him in the army (oh no-o-o-o-o) The wouldn't let him be a sergeant (oh no-o-o-o-o) A fireman was far too hard a thing for him to be He'd write parking tickets, but he doesn't like to read [Pre-Hook] But in high school, he lost a jellybean count And the winner didn't share them. Maybe that's what this all stems from [Hook x2] Hey, hey please don't go and Go and throw your life away Don't you don't you run from him Son cause he'll f** up your Day, No he's not gonna Waste his time taking your name Trust me there'll be no escape He's got two feet and half a brain Hey, hey please don't go and Go and throw your life away Don't you don't you run from him Son cause he'll f** up your Day, No he's not gonna Waste his time taking your name Trust me there'll be no escape He's got two feet and half a brain