Carter Deems - Soul Khan & Dirtbag Dan vs ATM & Carter Deems lyrics

[Round 1: ATM] This f*ggots favorite action picture Is one that he made in his room, with his Star Wars action figures [Carter Deems] Souls the type of guy that hits up a metro hotel then go shopping at a retro clothes sale His weekend goal is to brain Plex Rock's hair then paint Fresco's toe nails [ATM] Dirt loves cars and that's a best known told tale But what I bet most you didn't know is that his favorite ride is a Freshcoast coattail [Carter Deems] Dan has the type of face that could scare away a hitchhiker You hick rhymer Looks like Rick Steiner has been listening to too much Big Tymers [ATM] Is this a big sea fish diver who thinks he can spit fire? Or the Notorious big spider who proved Cali judges are dick riders? You look like an angry pirate screaming "f** it!" I sunk my ship And you look like Rick Moranis in Honey I Shrunk My Dick [Carter Deems] We're burning down everything, fire, gasoline, torches [ATM] Flamethrowers, lighters, bonfires, menorahs His girl wanted a ring [Carter Deems] But Soul couldn't afford it [ATM] That blows [Carter Deems] Fat Beats clothes [ATM] Now he can't pay his mortgage [Carter Deems] We're destroying everyone [ATM] Christians [Carter Deems] Jews [ATM] The Mormans [Carter Deems] This chick gets banged everywhere [ATM] Your house [Carter Deems] My couch [ATM] The backseat of my Taurus [Carter Deems] Y'all robbed everyone [ATM] Jack sh**t [Carter Deems] Nocan [ATM] Tiger Ty [Carter Deems] PoRich Y'all bite everybody [ATM] Lil' Krev [Carter Deems] ? [ATM] Pariah [Carter Deems] Chuck Norris [Round 1: Dirtbag Dan] On some real sh** ATM and Carter Deems The Special Olympics has smarter teams Paris figure skating has harder teams Than ATM & Carter Deems I mean, going through life retarded must've presented some mild challenges I half expected y'all to introduce yourselves by saying Wild Stallions! [Soul Khan] See when they first arranged this match up I thought "Something ain't kosher" Cause three hundred years ago y'all would be slave owners Y'all descendants from oppressors but now that that reigns over You try to be down like "Yeah brother I love grape soda." [Dirtbag Dan] This motherf**er looks like any junkie on a track How does it feel to have a monkey on your back That has a monkey on it's back Truth is, ain't nothing funny about you And how the f** are you an ATM when ain't nothing money about you [Soul Khan] If y'all wanna fight prepare for the loss of a limb My dreidel game is fatal your top is gonna spin We motherf**ing grizzly bears these salmon trying to box with they fins One punch will leave these southern bells Gone With The Wind [Dirtbag Dan] And frankly you queers I don't give a damn If he's in the building, pills are getting popped Aye T, what's the M stand for? Mush This motherf**er looks lost or at least one of his eyes is Y'all must've made loot from Perverted Justice with them little boy disguises [Soul Khan] Now ATM, you got a hundred yard stare like the path to God's tear With the face of John Mayer but you drive a John Deere And it ain't very often that I get to place the race card But y'all dream of keeping blacks under your thumb like a space bar And now I wanna beat the sh** outta Real Deal's son [Round 2: ATM] Man, Soul Khan, you really spit some sick lines That John Mayer thing would've been dope if it wasn't already said six times [Carter Deems] I know we're the underdogs tonight still we're gonna put up a fight I'll put Soul in a box [ATM] Wait, no you won't [Carter Deems] Yeah you're right [ATM] These two f*ggots are still getting beat bad So I'll put Dirt in a bag; cheap swag [Carter Deems] And Khan likes to skateboard without knee pads Get injured than eat scabs to help compensate that you grew up with three dads [ATM] Aye, didn't you get the memo? No one wants to see a red neck rapping and dancing Sarcasm will only get you so far Dan I'm actually handsome You remind me of two guys named Charlie [Carter Deems] Chaplin and Manson [ATM] Aye Dirt, when you're old, fat and balding I guarantee you'll look exactly like Captain Spaulding [Carter Deems] You can find Dan on the weekend double fisting two Pabst beers And Soul's outrageous voice is proof that Jews act weird [ATM] Wait, hold up, that's not fair You can't do that here That nose has whispered some lines into that beard [Carter Deems] Aye, stop dissing me, this is rewriting history and we're the author's choice And you look like Arthur The Aardvark if he was born with Bea Arthur's voice [ATM] I think it's about time these two sick f**s give up Cause you met your maker, me, Mr. Big Nuts Didn't think it would happen but you're getting ripped up 'gainst us And tomorrow after y'all get murdered by Mac and Madness [Carter Deems] Then what? Is he gonna go out to his pick up and have his wrists cut? [ATM] While I fist pump your six s*uts [Carter Deems] And pray out to God about all the people he robbed And die alone in his big truck [ATM] Look, this is a novelty act, there's a billion others that act just like them Rap just like them You look like Buddy Holly, I hope you die in a plane crash just like him [Carter Deems] I do too, I do too [Round 2: Dirtbag Dan] I said growing up retarded might present some mild challenges You stupid f**ers, you rep Buddy Holly and didn't say Ritchie Valenz sh** [Soul Khan] Way to go Carter, you're an amazing go-karter But the only place you really need to race is your own barber Honestly, yo' teeth look like the keys an accordion And let me ask, does that haircut come with keys to a Delorean? [Dirtbag Dan] And this muhf**a said if he had a grand he'd be like, "Let's go sniff." That shirt is on some Fresco sh** News flash, it just don't fit Word man, and this muhf**a is a Disturbed fan He shoots crack in the distance Except he got down with the syndrome before he ever got Down With The Sickness [Soul Khan] You know it's kinda f**ed up when I listen to Carter Cause I hear his style but I can't tell which of us is the father Y'all trying to blow up like Palestinian martyrs I'd tell you to go back to the drawing boards but ATM would just start sniffing the markers [Dirtbag Dan] This morning when he got in front of the mirror he said, "I want my hair to look like Akira." So I was like, "I just wanna let you know. When I seen you stumbling drunk down the hallway I wanted to scream, "Tetsuo!" And this motherf**er is not religious, y'all don't have to believe But I still think it's Adam and Eve not Adam and Deems And then ATM comes in and k**s it like this [Soul Khan] Alright here we go "You look like...a dick wizard got hit with...a dick wizard And it fell...into a dick wizard." And I know that's not a real thing But my face just lost...feeling [Dirtbag Dan] I wanna see Carter Deems, show me Carter Deems [Soul Khan] Alright, alright Hold on, hold on, hold on Yo these long gnomes lost those pointy hats of theirs And he's a rabbi and he's Jesus but they don't have a prayer Why you spazzing out like this f*ggot coming out of withdrawal? I expected more from a child that came outta my balls [Dirtbag Dan] And then Real Deal's kid is gonna beat the sh** outta you! [Round 3: ATM] I'll hit Dirt with a jab, he's leaning I'll leave Dirt full of scabs, he's bleeding I'll let Dirt get a win, keep dreaming I'll put Dirt in a bag; spring cleaning [Carter Deems] And Dirt I know your face is itching One slap and I'd murder the fleas but then I'd ruin Soul's favorite meal, a fur burger [ATM] With cheese And this motherf**er has a S.O.N.S. fetish When most of them wouldn't have to try hard to beat you I hope Fox punches your knees, Con headbu*ts your nuts And Heartless eats you [Carter Deems] And Brownbag Allstars are more awkward than your mom's sweaty hands In fact your rap crew is just a wack Jew and some Tom Petty fans [ATM] Your facial hair is sloppy silly ba*tard, you should trim them If this isn't Hillbilly Jim then Macho Man f**ed up his teeth trying to snap into a Slim Jim [Carter Deems] Excuse me sir, your basic humor serves as a complacent tumor Placed on the face of this outrageous loser Face it Bueller, grown men shouldn't cruise around in a Razor scooter Your beard smells like plagues and sewers You should really get that sh** spayed and neutered [ATM] We're pros [Carter Deems] You're amateurs [ATM] You choke [Carter Deems] In Canada [ATM] And your face is the number one cause of broken cameras [Carter Deems] Wearing Tapout shirts doesn't make you Kimbo Slice It's time to go back to Ben Folds Five Look up the PoRich battle if you wanna watch this shrimp folds live [ATM] And you know what Soul? Your nose does things you never even thought about Late night, hoping out sneaking over to Topper's house [Carter Deems] Going to eat at the Waffle House ordering large amounts Until your nostrils are forced to barf it out [ATM] That nose goes to a club just so it can Walk It Out And it does a lot of embarra**ing sh** it doesn't even wanna talk about [Carter Deems] Hey, doesn't your nose work at a Target now? It plays in a terrible group that makes awkward sounds [ATM] I don't think that's true I think that nose just gets drunk and commits a lot of party fouls And sniffs so much that it once tried a Sharpie out [Carter Deems] Doesn't that nose listen to a lot of Slaughterhouse? [ATM] No I think his nose is more into Modest Mouse [Carter Deems] Well at least we're being honest now [Round 3: Dirtbag Dan] Yo, when he's doing this sh** He thinks he's rocking the place You're getting exercise at least cause you're f**ing jogging in place I don't have much left I guess I could just call you a b**h See this is why I have Soul Khan write ALL OF THIS sh*t! [Soul Khan] I see ATM's face and dude's hope the ship just sank What can an ATM offer me? Jews own the banks Your chick never dick tease me that chick is just sleazy The fattest hooker in New Orleans, now that's what I call a Big Easy [Dirtbag Dan] Yo, he get a lil' lean, think he a bit wheesy Coughing, smoking weed, think he a bit Weezy Your sh**'s cheesy and your face greasy I can't leave your moms alone the b**h needs me [Soul Khan] Honestly fellas you are such f**ing f*gs You would eat a bag of dicks and then eat the f**ing bag Everyone in the crowd is wondering why they should even try This is basically a bye cause basically you're bi [Dirtbag Dan] Basically you're getting f**ed up, it is a waste of a try This guy is the real life Towlie, "Wanna get high?" And this muhf**er over here wanna get fly And he keep looking at me with that camera he got called a lazy eye [Soul Khan] Y'all gonna win this whole sh** if the judges vote for you Cause soon as they saw you were faces us I promised nobody wrote for you Cause we ain't got an equal flow, I'll be skeeting on your hoe Saying "Let my people go!" [Dirtbag Dan] And then Real Deal's gonna eeeeerrhhh!