Capitol Steps - The Fondler lyrics

MC: All right, it's time to begin the press conference with Governor Schwarzenegger. Schwarzenegger: Yes, you've all heard of Meet the Press, I call this Press the Meat. MC: Now, now, Gov. Schwarzenegger, what do you think of the critics who say that you lack the experience necessary to run the state of California? Schwarzenegger: Well, a lot of people don't know this, but for many years I served as Mr. Universe. During that time, I successfully ensured that the Earth never got too close to the sun, causing us all to burst into flames. I think if I can do that for the universe, California-a-a will be a piece of strudel. MC: Now, Governor, the environment is a cause that is very near and dear to the hearts of many Californians. How can you rea**ure us that our children will have clean air to breathe? Schwarzenegger: I plan to take a trip to Mars. When I get there, I will activate an ancient alien reactor deep in the planet's core there, thereby releasing pure clean oxygen for generations to co-a-me. MC: Well, at least you're a man of honor. Schwarzenegger (MC + Lady, simultaneously, plus all of 'arounds' in chorus): Yes, yes, I got on her. And I stayed on her. Back in Hollywood I was a stud at movie sets (stud at movie sets) I treated women badly, but I did not have regrets (did not have regrets) I'd tease 'em and I'd squeeze 'em, but I wasn't after s** (wasn't after s**) Since I'm a bodybuilder I was checking out their pecs (checking out their pecs) They call me the Fondler They said that I fondled her My hands went around and around and around and around and around Now up in Sacramento I'll sit at a pa** reversed (sit at a pa** reversed) I'm reaching out to everyone, just touching women first (just touching women first) I don't see any problem if I'm grabbing a few rears (grabbing a few rears) Compare that to what Davis has been doing to you for years (doing to you for years) MC + Lady: It seems Mr. Universe Was just a bit perverse Schwarzenegger (MC + Lady simultaneously for all "arounds"): My hands went around and around and around and around and around Schwarzenegger (MC + Lady): Now since my wife's a Kennedy (oo ah) When my s** life caused a fuss (oo ah) Her uncle said to me (oo ah) Ted: Er, ah, Arnold, my boy, er, ah, now you're one of us Schwarzenegger (MC + Lady): Well, now, I'm the type of guy who will admit when I am wrong (will admit when I am wrong) I'd like to say I'm sorry to the ladies in this song (ladies in this song) MC: So Arnold acted badly, that really isn't news Lady: You know he's acted badly if you've read his film reviews Schwarzenegger (MC + Lady, MC simultaneously for "hounds"): The people are hating how (oooo….) I'm like Bill Clinton now (oooo…) 'Cause I'm a hound a hound a hound a hound a hound MC + Lady: Ooo…ah… Schwarzenegger: California, yeah!