Caliph NOW - A Tale Of Two Parties lyrics

[Intro] [Reef talking]: {Phone ringing} Party at John's house tonight. sh**'s going to be f**in' insane. b**hes...f**in' they got kegs, nitrous, COME! [Verse One]: It go weed, coke, drank, Molly Lonnie had shots being taken off her body DJ rock and everybody sing along Bro dudes in the yard goin' hard on beer pong She a thong showin' Big blunt smokin' Billy feel sick sittin' by the window open Now chunks blowin', had too much Jaeger Hipsters actin' cool like the posin' for The Fader In the kitchen listen' to a couple not jellin' His girl got jealous now they both mad yellin' She starts cryin' wantin' to know where the stairs at Her sister's in the bathroom gettin' f**ed bareback Tommy lookin' at her like, "I'm bangin' a who*e" A line starts to form, they bangin' at the door The next door neighbor dare sleep now he is pissed Hangin' out the window, shakin' his fist Girls all dancin' shakin' their hips A fight broke out, some guy's breakin' his fist 40 bottles crushed and thrown off the roof Shots in the living room we all say "salute" The ground covered with blunt guts, beer and puke Cops pulled up so we had to flew the coup This is house party sh**, this is the life Wake up next morning, like what happened last night? [Reef talking]: Yo, yo, that was cool and sh** but yo. There's this new club that's opening and sh**, it's like...$50 cover, nahmsayin', $40 a drink but the sh** is f**in' crazy. Mad b**hes son, come with me, I.m telling you we'll have fun, but...you can't wear that yo. You got a suit? You got like some gators or somethin'? [Verse Two]: There's another party goin' on right up the street But to get in you can't wear your hat or sneaks The bouncer's a f*ggot the doorman's a geek The make you wait in line for what feels like a week You get to the front, bouncer says it's filled Plus you aren't dressed to impress nor k** So he says you can't get in and now you feel ill But then he says, "Yo, slip me a $20 bill." You grudgingly oblige and slide inside Only to find, nothing but the deaf, dumb and blind Outrageous weaves, gators and frost minks Shawty won't speak to you unless you bought drinks She's with her crew, their attitude it stinks Stank, they want men with bank, not men who think n***as ice grillin', don't look away or blink Bathroom attendants, said it cost to use the sink Leave him a tip for handing you a towel? I told him "I owe you" like I don't have a vowel Came out to someone screamin' mad loud Oh wow, now they bustin' shots in the crowd All hell broken loose, cops swarm like they're in Juice But y'all wasn't gonna let me and him in for wearin' a pair of boots?! [Reef talking]: f** y'all! This sh** is f**in' terrible, man I'm gettin' the f** outta here. This is the tale of two parties yo. 18 verse 30 yanamsayin'? Young, reckless, dumb, dickhead, house party, havin' fun sh**. Verse payin' $500 just to go out and stand around a bunch of booshie, stuck up motherf**ers man. f** every club in this city that make motherf**ers take off they Nikes. f** every club in this city that make motherf**ers take off they hats. f** every club in this city that charge a cover to get in your bullsh** club, you don't get nothin' with that cover, but to stand there cramped with a bunch of clown motherf**ers. You gotta wait in line for three hours to get a f**in' drink. You gotta wait in line for three hours to use the bathroom. Maaaaaan. sh** ain't the same no more man. I remember being young in college, man I may be a young guy, man we would just f**in' chill with our friends and have a good time. Now...going out man require so much energy man, so much f**in' bullsh**. n***as gotta wear a suit to f**in' drink. A suit?! Get the f** outta here with that sh** man. The thing about it is though...either way...the goal is to get f**ed up. So however you gotta do that sh**. Whether it's gettin' high at home or chillin' with your boys man. Do that. Cause this going out sh** is gettin'g played out in 2012. I'm 30 years old man, I can't f** with this sh** no more. I'mma end up murdering a bouncer or some sh** man. Stabbing a doorman in the f**ing neck with his pen. Beat him to d**h with his clipboard. Why y'all have a clipboard? You can't remember who the f**'s on the list? Is it that many motherf**ers you gotta stand there with a f**in' clipboard? This ain't New York motherf**er this is Philly. What the f** y'all got a velvet rope for man? I'll kick that sh** the f** over. We don't do that sh** man. f** that. I'm about to go to motherf**in' Broad Street Diner, steak and eggs, go the f** home. This night is over my n***a