Brian Kuma - Freaky Tales lyrics

Freaky tales, ICP, true stories, short version Real sh** The Mighty d**h pop Check it out WOOOO! I met this girl Her name was Joan She loved the way I rocked on the microphone When I met Joan I took her home She was just like a doggy all on my bone There's another girl her name was Pat She wasn't just thick naw the b**h was Fat She had pierced nipples and a Twiztid tat In between her bu*t cheeks she packed a gat I know this b**h named Rebecca Lou She could make you nut in a second or two She had a wicked surprise you don't expect her to If you hit the sh** raw she just infected you There's another freak her name was Pearl b**h loved nuts like a hungry squirrel I was tapped out but she tagged her girl Nutty nuttin' again in a new Neden world I met this chick named Rosalina Had to know her scent that hoe was Subpoena She took off her clothes as soon as I seen her She had me so stiff she froze my wiener I knew this girl named Izabel b**h wore a bell from Israel She was a freaky a** Jizzabel But her neden smelled like a bowl of instant hell Party night late fix Met this b**h named Honey Trix She had five kids at twenty-six But the b**h'll get pregnant just hummin' dicks There's a titty dancer, her name was Bri She had some good p**y and it came for free Not for everybody just mainly me I'm a minute man b**h, cause I aim to be I met this hoe named Sweet Denice Liberian Girl, but the freak's a beast Chained me to the wall leather and lace She wanted me to pee all over her face Snow bunny week end ski slope Met a sweet church girl said her name was Hope At first she was a prude cleaner than soap When I left she was a nympho hooked on dick dope I met this young chick named Janelle They say she was a loony but I could not tell She was cool as hell, it all went well But there's more to her story like Dave Chappelle There's another girl, I call her Boo Cork in the bunghole is all we do First she like to feed me some barbecue After that we smoke some weed and sniff some glue I met this girl, her name was Lois Me and Shags both, she loved to blow us The very first time she ain't even know us She swore she had sk**s and begged to show us I once met a b**h named crazy Claire She seen more dicks than Hane's underwear I would take a dump, she liked to stare She definitely had screws loose up there Skater chick, Lisa Lou I filled her up quicker than pizza stew She likes nuts on her belly and she eats it too She was so small like three foot two I met this girl, her name was Heather She was a thug b**h stuck on a tether She had me come by and bring her sh** But never did I leave without slinging her dick I knew a chick cop named Cara Ca** She had a Bang! Pow! Boom! Tat on her a** A 'lette in disguise, she was family And always let Juggalos off Scot free She was a freak, she made gansta love And liked it when I f**ed her with her billy club We cranked Shangri-La f**ing in her cop car She responded to the scene with nut in her hair Once met a queen named Maureen Neden so foul it had to be quarantined It burned through her fabric, and tore her jeans Like Chemical bombs of war, it seems I know this b**h named Betreena Ross Belly so big that the p**y was lost I dove into find it at any cost Found something else and her salad got tossed Met this hottie, her name was Sharon Her booty was stuffed in the jeans she was wearin' Blonde pig tails said she liked fat boys I hit it so hard her a** made a clap noise She had another friend, red hair, fake tits I hit it so deep I thought I had eight kids Her name was Amber but we called her red The only thing wrong was she never gave head I knew a mouth doctor named Ugly Anne Ass like a hippo from here to Japan But when she gave head I could barely stand She got the four year waiting list in demand I met this skank, her name was May She used to blow my home boy DJ Clay (What up dawg!?") She would come through any time of day 5:30 in the morning coming in like "Heyyy!" I met a cheerleader named Becky Mennard She was a daddy's girl, took me out on his yacht She was a b**h, yes, but yes she was hot She let me hit my wang thang on her G-spot There's another girl from the southwest side Gunshot wounds on her neck, she almost died But she lived, God let her slide Now she's sittin' on my dick and it's a long ride I once knew a rapper named Miss O'neal She couldn't rhyme for sh**, but she had s** appeal I whipped out my mic and down she kneel She spit a hot sixteen, a verse I could feel Gale from Evendale, we met online She was lookin' for some penis and sat on mine She was eight cents, not quite a dime But still memorable enough to make this rhyme Big, thick, strong and built Female wrestler, Lumberjill She could crack a walnut in her neden for real But she didn't, I told her lay back and chill I once met a witch named Azreal She rides a broom stick and lives in Hell I told her draw my stick out, cause it's the deal She possessed my package so it fits the bill Olivia, had a mouth like a machine Called The Ejaculator, this b**h is a fiend Stick in your sh** and like you'd never seen She twists, turns, s**s, and pulls and spits you clean There's a street walker on Central Ave Her name was Cinnamon, a spice I had to have I paid her, scoop her up and drew her a bath Scrub her neden clean and you do the math There's a hot wife named Dianne Faye She never goes out, work gets in the way It's a fantasy of hers to f** Violent Jay She said it all in a letter I got Friday I met her at WalMart doin' her chores Family restroom, behind closed doors I hit it on the counter while the water pours The same way I did it with that daughter of yours Freaky, deaky Met somebody else's ho that was sneaky We f**ed in the shower right at his place I nutted in the same rag he washes his face There's another girl, her name was Flo She was missin' teeth like my homie Lay Lo She liked to bone in front of the window So all her neighbors could see the b**h go The cops soon showed up, but even so We wasn't breakin' any laws that you know We was inside behind a door So b**hes take a picture it'll last you more Hound dog, groupie Met a thuggalette named July If I paint my face she would blow my meat I told her close her eyes and painted hers with Skeet A hooker tossed my salad and scuffed her knees She then took a breather and called Shareese Both of them hoes tag-teamed my meat I turned 'em out so good they had to pay me The very same night, I met with Sky Not quite a midget but about dick high No drank needed she was already fly If you keepin' the record, I scored me a Tri Early next morning I got a call from Kim b**h woke me up at like 6:00 AM (six in the morning) She was comin' down from a 6 day binge f**ed her sleep woke her up and we f**ed again Met an old flame, her name Shanelle She loved this dick in her neden can*l Up and down my back with her fingernails She jumped on the phone and called some pals They was gonna meet us at a quarter to twelve I'm thinkin' three b**hes, this is gonna be swell But when they showed up, dudes, what the hell? Six eyes got swelled and I'm back in jail Ho, skank, trick and s*uts (COME AND GET IT!) These dick and nuts Don't be scared if it fits your bu*ts Alison, Natalie and all chicks what I banged this one b**h, Hilary Duff It weren't really her but who gives a f**? Her name was Helen but close enough It didn't matter to me when she was in the buck This chicken named Shawna don't front for sh** She only come around to score this dick I don't play guitar, I don't sing a lick I just make the bed squeak hard and that's it I once met a freak named Laura If your name ain't Shaggy she'll ignore ya I blew her out back stage, at the Agora But it was Dougie in the paint ya dumb who*e ya Now I see nothin' wrong with hoggin' And Pam loves food over joggin' Feed her good, she'll be bobbin' on your meat stick Pam Pam hot damn she's a freaky chick Freak nick '96 Met this ho named Shawna Licks She was an escort who loved turnin' tricks And I soon found out she was burnin' dicks Met a cowgirl named Rachel Lee I stepped to her and then she had a date with me She was rodeo champ and she rode on me And got bumped into a tree when I unloaded my skeet Once upon a time I met Nadeen She was forty-two and I was only eighteen She liked to freak, she's just a fiend It really didn't matter when I saw her in jeans I met this hottie named Doctor Lil' She had a nice neden with a spot to fill I dumped in her box cause she was on the pill Bumpin EPMD's, you got to chill Knew a hot chick from south of Spain She was so pretty with a mouth to bang I loved it when she left her titties out to hang But Rosetta moved home an' I'm out in the rain I want a big, freak fat and sloppy I keep goin' back to watch her mop me Two tons of fun, big mamma jamma A country girl from Alabama I once met a hooker, she did it for free On the foothill bus number forty-three All the way in the back she was workin' me I had my dick beat boxin' I was jammin' the beat There's a fine b**h sittin' on my face Thick a** b**h, said her name was Grace Sweet honey-licious, I enjoyed the taste But I almost suffocated pa**ed out in place Met a fine dime, you know my type Summer the plumber, she'll unclog your pipe I made my appointment for a Saturday night Her a** crack showed but that was alright I once knew a dime, she knew Kung-Fu I told her bring a friend, and Boo brung two Dana came through with Amy and Sue They pleased me until my dick sneezed goo Ha-Choo There's another shorty her name was Kay From the Letters to Cleo band, back in the day She fell off hard, should've seen it my way f** Cleo, she should've sent them letters to Jay p**n star freak, sweet Bri O'neal She looks good, and her titties are real I swam through the p**y like a Navy SEAL But then I woke up so lame I feel Susan came over on a ninja bike She was a dyke, but my dick she liked She pulled her leather pants off and I was psyched I banged her neden up to get home she hiked Met a lot of freak in my life span Freak one night with a hottie named Cam She had more weed than Amsterdam I blew a shotgun with her neden lips, damn! Cam got me so high, f** comin' down I called this goofy b**h named Sa**y the Clown She had big balloon titties and a painted on frown She left paint all on my dick, but I'm down There's another ho, her name was Jewel I hit it so hard, she took a dump Left scratches on my back like a wild raccoon I can say I won't be back soon Met a fine bitty, named Dina She was a built little freak from China Do I wanna hit it? Well kinda Even from the back I don't mind ya Late that night the doorbell rang The Ferris Twins wanna do that thang Dina just left, don't know if I can hang But I'm damn sure about to try, bang bang I met this chick named Maria Lay She was a girl scout leader during the day At night, she in my ear hole, purrin' away I told her trim her sh** there's too much fur in the way There's a house wife who lives next door She likes to come by and have s** on the floor She makes lemonade that she sets on the porch She cheats on her man cause he's such a dork What was I to do when I met Sue? Six times Miss Booty of Gallabuzoo Ass like Nicki Minaj plus two I don't even know how my dick gets through I met an English girl named Kiki Crooked and sneaky but freaky Both her nipples burn like a tiki I nutted on her face cause she was cheeky Freak show, s** bot I met this b**h named Alexa She had two p**y holes, take your pick To get the last drop out she'll shake your dick Micky Mouse club chick Brenda Song I see her on TV, my dick rose long I don't wanna diss her or say nothin' wrong Cause maybe one day I can peel her thong I got a call from Roxanne Roxanne She's a couple blocks down gettin' a tan She's pretty cool, but I feel boxed in I hit it one time now she's locked in She likes the way I hit it, how smoothly I did it I even ate her booty out, f** it, I'll admit it She fell in love, but I was just drunk Now she hounds so hard I think I'm gettin' punked Met a girl named Nina Or sh**, was it Tina? A thick lil junky from Pasadena I thought she was Snooky first time I seen her Didn't know if I wanted to f** her or beat her I'm an a**hole, ask Francine I took her out to dinner and then Dancing Later on we was f**ing, it all went wrong I hit it from behind and called her Brenda Song I met this b**h from Compton Cat She was a Crip and her name was Vale She tattooed my name right across her Neden I never called back, she wanna stomp my head in There's another girl, her name's Michelle Her booty was bigger than a tail on a whale When I freaked Michelle, I freaked her well Her p**y got hotter than the flames in hell Wheezy from the 5-0-3 She was an acrobat and loved to dive on me Her neden was small, but her titties was huge She was quick to lick every last drip of dick sploodge There was one time I undressed Vanessa Her booty fell out bigger than the dresser Between her a** cheeks was her home girl Tessa She must've sat on her and forgot none-the-lesser Tessa was a twig, Vanessa was big You wouldn't believe the stupid sh** we did Once we was done, two became one As Tessa slipped back in where she came from, um I once met a bomb chick named Swan She had her iPod on bumpin' the Kong, um We got our date on and it was Napalm, um Gave me a hummer o-oh what's up son? I was at the bar when I met Rain She took me in the girls' room and gave me brains Then on my wang she rubbed c**aine I hit it in her a** and she felt no pain Later that same night I met Stace The one eyed snake nutted in her face We f**ed like rabbits all over the place And when the tag came I was gone no trace When I got home, peep what I did Young Christine was watchin' my kid I paid her with cash and then some dick She stayed and made breakfast before she split I was in church when I met Desire She sounded so good leadin' a choir She said she had more talents I would admire And my dick soon found out she was no liar I once met a sweetie named Sherry She was so hot it was scary It was trimmed perfect nothin' hairy All the way to my balls dick buried Sherry f**ed nice but the head was shot She hooked me up with a pro named Dottie Who had a hog's face and a penguin's body But she made me cum quicker than a Mozzarotti I met an ice skater named Annie Her neden taste sweeter than candy Her flexibility came in handy We both loved to 69 something dandy I f**ed hotties all across America But never met a b**h like Erica She looked so fine people stared at her At the mall we did a bu*t naked caricature She was a beauty queen But loved to cause a scene At only eighteen she was hellified mean I finally told her f** off and left her on the scene I later seen her getting peed on in a magazine I bumped into this freak named Trisha She was part of the Michigan Militia She would always plot for something to explode But all she ever got was me and my load uh I met a lunatic named Jacky Every time she got horny she would slap me Something about causin' pain made her happy She said soft love makin' was sappy So I got with it and choked the s*ut Headbu*ted her face and punched her in the gut Soon flexed a hoe and then stretched her more She screamed bu*t naked and bolted out the door Gale, and April too big fans Always flashing titties way up in the stands What you tryna do, boo? Let's make plans My dick and balls package is in your hands Lindsay Girl from Syracuse I'm diggin' everything in your pair of shoes I'm fallin' so hard I need a parachute I got you a banana and a pair of fruit I met this girl her name was Tess In only ten minutes she was out of her dress She was on d** and her hair was a mess But the way she caressed my meat was the best With such finesse and not a damn thing less She even let it rest between her chest breast And right before it bust up in her love nest She kissed it with zest, and pa**ed the big test I met an old lady named Ulga Feed Her p**y smelled like a bowl of pulperie She knitted me a quilt and we sipped tea But she only wanted dick hole from me There's another freak named Sally May I met her a** sleepin' in an alleyway She was a bum but that was just fine Cause underneath her rag coat, the b**h was a dime Basketball player named two-tall Lynn She was a skinny string bean, six foot ten I slam dunked her neden and shattered the rim My boys laughed but it really didn't matter to them To get topped off, I had to climb a ladder Things went south though when she got fatter Her knees went bad and then she got sadder She moved to Belize and told me to scatter I knew a dick s**er named Vacuum Betty She would blow your dick even when you ain't ready As soon as you called before you hang up the phone Your dick is in her mouth and she's blowin' your bone Cherry, Cherry, strawberry shake How many licks of a tongue does it take Before my candy cane starts to break But I love the way, make no mistake I once met a b**h from London, France Her name was Minnie and she loved to dance I was so geeked I cum in my pants But she was always good to give another chance Freak named Shannon, such a sinner She smokes that pipe and she's gettin' thinner Shannon is cool but her mind is gone One fat bot and it's goin' on The Bella twins, Bree and the other Hit it so hard tryna make them a mother They both freaked me down including each other And then fight about which one is my lover I once knew a hottie named Velvet Sky She was with my homie but I had to try She freaked me down so hard I started to cry She never called back and I don't know why Leanne from Pakistan She never had a problem when I pack it in She snackin' on my nutsack, cackling Nutted in her a** crack and I'll be back again I met a movie star named B D Like the paparazzi, I was waitin' She came out the party, I stepped with game A half an hour later she was screamin' my name As I put it to her, my dick was goin' through her I blew her neden out deeper than a sewer She rode on me, we blow'd on tree She begged me to stay but I rolled on free There's another girl, her name was Julie Eighty-five percent of this b**h was booty To wax every square inch that's my duty It don't matter but thankfully she a cutie Hot bu*t named Jo-Jo Up and down my knob like a yo-yo Faster and faster like go, hoe Til my nut came shooting like ohhh, oh Look at this b**h from Monani In a hot pink thong named Randy f**in' on the beach p**y got sandy I took the pa** option went and got Mandy Mandy was young, that I could tell Met her workin' drive thru at Taco Bell First time she blew me uh not so well But this last time baby was hot as Hell There's a fat hottie named Pamalo I was mad attracted to her Camel Toe She was so slammin' she had to know Climbed on top of her belly and I jammed it slow I knew a red-headed hottie named Harriot We was at the penthouse in a Marriott She had a flaming hot red hairy spot But I cooled it off good with my Cherry Pop NYC, Ecstasy She bought me a drink and sat next to me She pulled my dick out my pant leg s**ually She was a call girl, for me though, the s** was free Matter of fact, she writes checks to me When we ain't f**in' she's textin' me She's on my dick hard it never gets to me I just give her this pipe, the best of me I met a hooker, her name was Meg She had a fat a** but was missing a leg I wanted to hit, but I refused to beg Her neden was bum, smelled like a fried egg There's another queen, her name's Darlene Her nipples were sweeter than a jelly bean She looked so stacked in her painted on jeans I called her a goddess like Charlie Sheen Freak one night with a chick named Roe She kept her cell phone in her camel toe Somebody blew it out before me though When I was up in it I didn't even know Neden tatted, pierced and shaved I met a punk rocker said her name was Jay She said a golden shower is how she played Her pee sprayed out like lemonade f** that I just won't get laid If that's what you teachin' I flunk that grade I ain't havin' that even if you paid I blew her mouth out like a hand grenade I met this honey, her name was Bunny She was from Brooklyn and she called me Dunny She blew my dick like its nose was runny The a** was worth it's weight in money Freaky D worked at Pizza Hut A freaky s*ut cause she eats your bu*t I seen her digits carved into a stall She came right over and gargled my balls I bumped into this girl her name was Rosalita We hit the hotel and had it goin' on Holiday inn until the break of dawn When I took baby home I freaked her mom Late night s** with Lexy My dick grew harder than a can of Pepsi When the b**h nutted it was like epilepsy I knocked her boots back home to Pokipsi I met a fine flower, her name was Laburn I hit it for an hour my dick was stern With nothin' but power, my engine turned Then it got sour, dried up and burned I met a giddy broad named big Joelle She loved s**in' dick, hoe, quick as hell She love it when my dick grow thick and swell But then it shoot, spit turn weak and frail I met an angel named sweetie Marie Her neden hole taste like key lime pie Up and down, all around, s**in' me dry My sweet bu*terfly got nut in her eye Miss No Name California hottie Asked me to sun-tan lotion her body Is she playing? She must be kiddin' I slipped my finger up into her neden At first, she resisted, and then she insisted Finally pulled my hand out and kissed it Took me to her hotel, few words said Stranger lovin', we broke the bed Meth head Beth took her on a date She was eighteen goin' on fifty-eight I couldn't hit it though, I did debate But her mugly face was just too great Plus size model named Carol Her belly was bigger than a barrel She would throw me around like a rag doll She goes out with some other f*g now I met another girl, her name was Bloom Some poor s**er would be her groom I put my foot in her neden and it still had room Her sh** was so blew-out we call her kaboom There's a fine hoe named Coconut She'll make you mad enough to choke the s*ut She humps so rough she broke your nut Then she'll make it up to ya, let you poke her bu*t Sexy freak, her name was Fox That chick in high school everybody jocks Now she's lettin' me bang her box I couldn't find a rubber, I used my socks There's a find thing named Morgan A Gothic freak who plays the organ Black fingernails, black clothes, black hair But up under there, hot pink thong-wear uh Met Lynn at the water park Off the diving board, I heard her fart Her cheeks turned red I said worry not I was more concerned with that furry spot There's another girl, her name was Rita Baby thought I might mistreat her and beat her I told her like this: she can s** my Peter Or either go home, cause I knew I didn't need her Three weeks ago, I met this freak She followed me around like Mary Sheep I hid around the corner, and when she came I grabbed her by the arm and I asked her name She said her name was Nora I could see her aura Her Neden was a forest and my dick was an explorer I truly did adore her I could not ignore her Kept a pair of her soiled panties hidden in my drawer I met a little squirrel named Sandy Cheeks I chased that neden round town for weeks Her nipples were crooked and her booty hole leaks But that be the 'haps f**in' with sewer freaks I once met a nurse said her name was Peach Her face was hit, looked a lot like Screech Her body was the hottest on the Florida beach Her titties were so fine I spent an hour on each Look who it is, Vivian The baddest dick rider in Michigan As soon as you nut you wanna hit again And she'll work your stick into oblivion Oh my god, here comes Heidi In her yellow panties, see through nighty She'll make your limp dick strong and mighty But her voice sounds like MC Shydee I got a phone call from Jasmine She was a p**n star but a hasbeen She was a no tan pasty white chalky hoe Livin' in Mexico doing a donkey show Aloha, Lola from Oahu I thought I didn't but I got to She had a thick bush, but I shot through She claims I ate it but it's not true I had a stalker named Maddy A short stout plump little fatty She parks outside in her caddy And wants my physique like badly I bring home hoes, and she runs 'em off And dresses like a palm tree when I play golf I finally decided I would stuff that muff One good plow and she had enough I met this cougar named Alicia Burn She was well equipped to unleash your s**m She f**ed so tough she would tweak your perm Drop to her knees and freak your worm Sugar delight Friday night It's goin' down Wicked clown Two days ago, I met this gal She bought fake titties at a rummage sale One of them was flat, and that was stale But she offered some tail, I think I shall Holla'd at this girl folks called her Peg Body was shaped kinda like a egg I was ten pumps in, of course from behind Snapped the rubber off and busted on her spine Met another dame named Ricky Jones I love the way she screams her freaky moans Ass like a Clydesdale this b**h owns I would bust my nut and feel it in my bones Big broad b**h named Baby Bard As everywhere, packed full of lard Titties tatted up with Joker Cards After I'd nut my dick stayed hard Met an Amish girl named Mary-Anne She liked my meat, no vegetarian Home-made wine we drank Cherry-Anne We f**ed like hogs, it was scary man Heat sweat, hot and sticky Met this thing named Tricky Vicky She loved to play a game called lick the dicky On top of my mushroom tip a hickey Ricky Lake, talk show host At one time she was known coast-to-coast We drank all night to my dick we toast Brag I will and I'm quick to boast She liked it when I licked the most Took her out to eat, we ate pig roast That's her tongue on the tip of my post I k**ed that neden, now it's a ghost Ninth grade teacher, Ms. Malane I met her years later after I got paid She took me home, overnight I stayed We f**ed all night as the Beach Boys played I like big a**es, big as the moon I met big mama named Giant June She had more a** than her panties had room I laid underneath and she loomed with doom She sat on my dick and the bed went boom My scrotum popped as you might a**ume Too much weight, bendin' my broom I'm buried in a**, or is it my tomb? Fine a** prom queen Jillian Her neden was worth a million I k**ed that p**y and I k** it again She loved my little buddy Gilligan Last name Kim, first name Gale She could make my dick grow hard as a nail I won't tell a lie though the s** was stale Til I corked that booty, the holy grail I delivered my dick like urgent mail Her neden was open like a garbage pale She wanted to cum, I refused to fail Hit it hard from behind like we was in jail Rustle window in the front of her home Met a fine hottie named Moanin' Joan Her lips were injected with silicone But way too much and it's k**in' my bone I like fake titties but prefer the real Skin tight clothes, mini skirts and heals Wild Wanda with flirt appeal She jacks my wang til it squirts her meal Pop star Rihanna and Katy Perry Both hoes look good enough to marry Lady Gaga looks more like Larry I heard she has nuts, big and hairy Kinky freaks Nessa and Nan They want whips and chains and S&M They don't even want you kissin' them But I make love and don't mess with them I like to hump, and hug and stroke I ain't out here tryna to get choked See me if you want them neden's poked And I like havin' my penis smoked Five months ago, I met this dame I have to admit I never asked her name She took it in her mouth, all the same Her pig tails spun every time I came I met a vixen named Dorothy Zoe Back in the day, she was a dorky hoe Her booty got bigger and bigger some mo' And now that a** drags on the flo' I once knew a freak named Jessa Jan She was much hotter than the rest of them I bust everywhere on her chest and chin It didn't take long to have s** again Debra Dunne from Dublin She loves the fact I'm scrubbin' She sick of the stud she was rubbin' on Now it's my snack she's grubbin' on Hanky Panky Hillary Sex so rough she's k**in' me I begged and pleaded, slow your role She's dominatrix, with total control Wicked, mean a** Carry Anne I see you on TV, screamin' again On celebrity rehab, you was a b**h But I love the way you make your booty switch Sex addiction, let's overdose And f** each other til we comatose Carry Anne let's ditch this peanut stand And do what me and my dick have planned Victoria Justice, much too young But I can't tell my meat that cause it's sprung Nickelodeon Girl, come get some You fiendin' get slimed, this time it's cum Chris Hansen tried to shut me down But she was eighteen cause I checked her out Call me sick, I'm a wicked clown Old a** pervert, five-hundred pounds, b**h I'm sick like syphilis But I was just right for this chick Phyllis She was suicidal, once slit her wrists She's like a time bomb, don't get her pissed Don't look now, her comes Lulu Like Phyllis, she too was coo-coo She made a doll of me cursed with voodoo Don't laugh fool cause she'll do you too Her p**y taste better than granny's stew It was a mouth full like Big League Chew Her mouth was full when she did me too She swallow and never liked to spit free goo Muscle-bound b**h, huge biceps She jacked my meat on several reps When it came to the s**, I better last Cum too quick and she would kick my a** Betsy Bets, a straight up mess Award winning nipples but saggy breasts Spread that neden out smooth like bu*ter When I said bend over, I did not stutter Serenis, Serenis, she'll clean out your penis b**h gave brains like a certified genius She'll tear that dick up one of the meanest If you're talkin' booty-hole she's got the cleanest I f**ed Jolene eight times a day Like Burger King you can have it your way If you're up in her guts you might get lost Swim through the skins and neden sauce Late night, bump that ba** I hump on pace in and out of her face 5:00 AM, dick like cement We never knew each other's name, we was both bent There was a doggy, humpin' my leg It's owner got jealous, her name was Peg She kicked it in the a** and checked it quick She barked like a dog as I inject this dick This b**h named Bubbles, fresh out on parole I'm in my squad car on p**y patrol I got the handcuffs and put her under arrest And sentence my skeet all over her breast Call me the Sultan with the harem of hoes Nine are fine and one's head I sposed Tenner in my bed, we don't need clothes I'm smothered in p**y holes down to my toes The more the merrier is how I rolls Add a b**h another few inches it grows I picked most these hoes up rockin' shows Brag about it on Twitter, that's how it goes Met a heavy chick built like a pumpkin She loved foreplay and a lot of dry humpin' The only bone was scabs on my meat b**h never even got naked, weak Titty bar, thunder and rain I spring hoes from Alison to Zane And every damn last b**h in between Lead 'em back to my house with a trail of c**aine I met a fine thang waitress at Denny's She said come to a party at her girl Jenny's I asked about p**y, she said I could have plenty Said I'll call you later and tipped her four pennies Gettin' topped off down 75 High on Meth she was all the way live Slam into a wall, I barely survived She finished my nut up before she died Circus broad that swallowed swords Head-bu*ted bricks and kicked through boards The head was incredible, and I was fluttered I clenched my bu*t cheeks as I nutted Darlin' Dureaky, I met her at a pub She was my partner in the mile high club We freaked some with her sister in my hot tub I ate eight pussies like a plate of hot grub Redneck Beau from Mississippi Her teeth looked like she brushed with Jiffy Her face was hit, bust my nut in a spiffy She begged me to eat it but that was too iffy Her Grandpa Ken came bustin' in So much beard, the sun missed his chin Out the window, he's shootin' but A hottie drivin' by straight scooped me up I met this girl, her name was Jenna My dick stood straight up like an antenna She had a box, I was dyin' to enter But she gave head like a sad beginner There's another freak named Sonya Soy She had fine lumps like an Almond Joy She liked Veronica, lotion and toys I couldn't satisfy her, took all my boys There's a girl I wanna bring up again Brenda Song with my nut on her chin I give up, she'll never let me hit Unless she falls off on Meth and sh** Then I'll have a chance Pealin' off her pants Penis to the p**y I slowly advance Together we in bed She lean in to give me head But first I eat the p**y like a Thankgiving spread I once knew a hottie named Cocamo She could turn my dick into a totem pole She cupped my balls and blow me slow I eat neden but prefer to poke 'em though Hot a** head turner, named Pauline She was nothin' friendly, this b**h is all mean She could break your dick off and leave you crawling Don't think I'm in love yet, but I'm falling Fine a** chick, her name: Billy Big fake titties like Jennifer Dilly Her neden hole queefed and I thought it was silly But it felt nice, vibrated my willy Sue, I wanna be pals with you Sexy hair dresser out of Malibu She has a couple of sisters I'ma nail 'em too Keep s**in', ho, I'll be sailin' goo Lacy Lace, let's leave this place Back to the Tally hop on my face Pretty a** taco, how's about a taste? She teased me with it, wild goose chase She got me goin' looney mental case Big a** titties and a skinny waist Stroke that sh** just keep the pace It sprays like mace, my sticky paste One fine time, her name was Kenna Her booty had a tattoo 'Do not enter' She said whip it out, I said I'm tryna Run up in her like Bruce Jenner Centerfold named Gigi Titties pointed out like tipis I bust my load and have weak knees Her nipples harder than BBs I met a stanky thang named Natalie She wondered if my dick was fat like me The only way to find out: straddle me Sent a b**h back home happily Met a fine hottie, they called her Kat She made my dick harder than a baseball bat On the tip of my gap is where she sat She spun around thrice and my dick went splat Fine chick, white hot Becca Lynn Sexy a** nedens I'm wreckin' them Big bangin' a** I'm checkin' that Bust my nut in seconds flat Don't look now, I'm the p**y inspector And this right here is my skeet injector I eat hoes like Hannibal Lecter I'm a p**n star actor and director Groupie Rachel She was excited, okay, chill We goin' on a date so take your pill Make no mistake, your neden's gettin' filled Don't be late, come get the real The s** is great and it's a thrill Don't hesitate, hop on the Dill 'Til the bed break and bet it will Skeet, skeet, sweet Beverley She could make you skeet so cleverly She could make you skeet so heavenly Covered in skeet and she's seventy That was gross, but so is Lois We hit it in the a**, and then she'd blow us Always on time, she would never hoe us She had crooked titties and loved to show us School bus driver named Miss Manoe Her neden hole looked like a big canoe Her titties looked like piles of puddin' goo I still hit it though, wouldn't you? Ooh, ooh, I'm nuttin' again Thinkin' about my home girl when She was hellafied, a perfect ten Carmel, bu*tery sulky skin What I gotta do to get back in? Wet like a mermaid without the fin I been jackin' off, tryna pretend Showed up at her house and left with a grin Here we go Juggalos You and all your pals Wackin' up freaky tales Two months ago, I met Blossom She comes around at night like a possum She's lookin' for skeet bombs, baby I gots 'em On top of that my dick work is awesome There's another broad, her name was Keisha Everything on her was her best feature I was the pupil and she was the teacher She could be far and my dick would still reach her Right on my face, baby I'll seat ya Don't need a fork or a spoon to eat ya Ninjas wanna f** you as soon as they meet ya I'ma tear that a** up like some kind of creature Thick, hot, pretty a** Peg Skeet on top like I'm packin' a keg She has a gay brother, his name was Greg f**in' in the dark, someone's touchin' my leg Cut the f**in' lights on, he was gone I'm hopin' it was the cat and that I was wrong Either f**in' way, I lost my bone Put my f**in' pants on I'm goin' home Met a stripper chick named Megan Forty-five year old, titty-saggin' On top of that, baby was raggin' Even so, there I was still taggin' Met a super hottie named Crystal Lash She was known to pull her pistol fast Paid young honey well equipped with cash But still super freaky, she would lick your a** Monica, an erotic hoe Met her at the bar at the Belagio I thought she was an escort, but what do I know? She was just a horny hottie, though There's another chick, Gloria The head was pure euphoria The p**y-hole was heaven sent So tight my dick's forever bent It's evident, she's one of the best But nothin' like sweet Evanese I wiped my dick off on her dress And left my skeet spewed on her chest We f**ed all night and never rest Straight hump and bu*t f** never kiss She even brought a special guest For the three-way salad tossin' fest Scary Jerry, a funny broad If you seen her give head, you would applaud The way she bobs her neck is odd She'll get the job done cause she's no fraud Freaky little bombshell named Rochell Red hair, big titties, southern bell With big buck teeth and two pigtails We partied I drank and she did rails Gangsta b**h, three time felon Ass like two fat watermelons I peeped that sh** and my dick start swellin' Now I'm up in that p**y dwellin' Hangin', loiterin', holdin' it steady Like I do with burlesque Betty She told me call her when I'm ready She blow my wad like pop confetti I called and called and blew her up That night she let me do her bu*t I screamed with joy as I spew my nut And shot my goo all on the s*ut What, what? Here we go Met an English girl named Cheerio Only two teeth, she was a scary hoe Most of her titties were areola La, from the carnival bar She s**ed dicks and turned tricks out of her car She sang 'fore you bust, played a lot of guitar Last I heard she moved to Guadalajara Raw Rhonda, Rhonda, foreign small built like a Honda She had home girls, Andra and Sandra Triple teen dream lovin' here to Rowanda And I kinda wanna f** her Talk about Delorious midnight trucker She licks my wang like a blowpop s**er But then she got preggers and now I dump her Kerplunk, my dick just sunk Right up in her trunk of funk I bang out her badonkadonk I dumped my junk and then it shrunk I woke up to the sound of a couple b**hin He yelled, "go home," she yelled, "good riddance!" I yelled through the window of my kitchen "Hey baby-boo, what your name is?" Gretchen f** that lame fool, come inside No need to walk, I'll give you a ride I hit it all night as her boyfriend cried I woke up to the aroma as breakfast fried I once knew a chick named Sophia A hottie out of Ethiopia She asked what I'm doin' I'm gropin' ya Are we gonna f**? Well I'm hopin' to I knew a young sweetie named Bobbit She was much shorter than a hobbit Her neden hole I liked to mug and rob it My mouth dick and fingers we mob it There's another freak, her name was Fran Skeet in her p**y that was my plan I wanna bang it out as hard as I can Her neden's so hot it gave my dick a tan I knew a big woman named Ulga She was like a bowl but I rolled her I wasn't scared of her and I told her Until I caught a wiff of that polder I knew an inked up girl named Tatty Tats One of them broads with thirty cats She was against all Jimmy hats But saved the cigars and those congrats I pulled out and coulda dumped on her waist But chose instead to aim for that face You crazy b**h, get you a taste She tattooed where my skeet was placed There's another dame, her name was Sean I jammed it in the a** til the break of dawn In the bedroom, back yard and front lawn I attacked that booty like Ghangis Khan Hotel, no sell We don't need a room just the isle of bell We scared the deers, she was wild as hell I get thank you letters, a pile of mail Late night s** with Abatha She f**s you like she's mad at ya She'll brutalize and ravage ya Ooh yeah, like Randy Savage y'all Will I f** Helen? There's no tellin' As soon as she calls my dick starts swellin' I walked to her house thank god I'm Gellin' Bad knews she ain't with dudes like Ellen Veronica, Veronica I blew on her neden harmonica We f**ed for seven days straight, our own Hanukkah She could flex her neden bionica I met a Texas hooker, her name was Alice She claimed she f**ed two thirds of Dallas Her p**y was a used up big a** callous I won't lie, hittin' that sh** was the stalest I had an old Girlfriend, her name was Tish Her booty was flawless, perfectionist She could blow your nut off with just a kiss Man oh man, that b**h I miss People find her, I tracked her down Her new boyfriend smacked her around I cracked his crown out of town that night The old bed squeeked nuts on her itch slap sound Late night humpin', body parts thumpin' Met this hottie said her name was somethin' She was freaky, shaved clean and neatly Pristine and squeaky, she eats me weekly Late night creepin' with Melanie She screamed big J keep nailin' me The dirty talk baby was tellin' me Straight up oughta be a felony Laona, Laona, straight out of Daytona It's her p**y but I'm the owner Fireworks in the sky every time I bone her We lay on the beach and sip Coronas There's another freak, her name was Lauren Her p**y came so hard it was pourin' I knocked that a** out til the mornin' When I left her neden hole was still snorin' Thick a** thighs, strong a** tummy I met a pro dancer, stage name Yummy She had false teeth and gave me a gummy I seen her act and the sh** was crummy I met a fine a** chick named Shya Her p**y was burnin' set my beard on fire I ate that biscuit til my tongue grew tired She was a call girl and my time expired Look at this bu*terfly, so damn fine Her a** was immaculate, her name's Divine I met her in a church confession line I pulled her panties to the side and stabbed it from behind Hot mama, middle aged queen named Joyce We f**ed in her plushed out pink Rolls Royce She had an old dried up whiskey voice Her manicured p**y was always first choice I once knew a freak named Joanne She would give the neden up for no man I fought for it harder than Hulk Hogan I begged let me hit it, and she said I sure can Sexy hot and racy I met this chick named JC She blew me from that back, she's crazy But so acrobatic and amazing She hung by her feet from the chandalier And stuck her face up in my rear What the f** is she doin' now? We screwin', bang pow boom and plow Renae, Renae, this hoe don't play I wanna make love until we float away Take a short break, maybe smoke a jay And then we can stroke, poke and play I met a super freak named Caroline Her neden had me hooked like h**n Through her p**y, my dick came barrelin' I want every hoe in this world we in So there I am, Tokyo, Japan Met a geisha girl named Gina Chan She cleaned my dick, like spick and span She cooked me steak and served me clam I knew a big broad named Becky If she falls on me she'll wreck me She fell on my dick directly And worked her weight correctly All that side straight pressure rise To that hot spot between her thighs I bust my load and rolled back my eyes Big Becky cool like one of the guys I met a rich b**h, her name was Blair She was a West Palm beach millionaire f** the money though, I didn't care I wanted that a** and up in there She was clean, douched and prepped I was sprung and she had me pimped I was her boy toy, full of joy I thought she loved me til she called me Roy There's another chick named Victory She had this thing with lickin' me Includin' my a**, which was sick to me I tried hers and it taste like Hickory I met a cowgirl, said her name was Ruth She could whistle for a horse with her big a** tooth This b**h stunk if you want the truth Even so I knocked her boots all the way to Delooth Holy f**, pull over the car Street walkin' beauty like a shining star She was perfect, from behind so far When she turned around she looked like GWAR Met this hottie named Neeka Ass like alpha ann seeka Couldn't tell but I think she was a tweeka When we f**ed she was louder than a speaka I met a young hottie at seven eleven She asked for a favor, said her name was Heaven Would I buy her a case of Bud And if I do we'd make some love She was nineteen and I was old Her neden was warm and my dick was cold I bought that brew like I was told And spent some time up in her folds I met this b**h named Cherry Puss We both loved smokin' strawberry Kush We got so high in her mama's basement In between her legs is where my face went The Hatchet Boyz, kings of the mat Wrestled one night and I met this rat Named Fiona, her belly was fat But her titties weren't all that pancake flat There's a girl named Zora at the party store She makes no secret she's a dirty who*e We f**ed in the cooler, my a** was cold Cause I laid on the floor as my dick she rode Three sister, Lola, Lea and Lana Two was nineteen the other older than Madonna All fine as hell, f** 'em all I wanna Threw my dick in their faces like a Hurricanrana Mike E. Clark, Legs, Diamond too They can vouch, these rhymes are true All my homies have heard us brag They know about the hoes we tag Our young homie Clay heard us rap And said he had way more freaks than that We told 'em like this, they might be freakin' But boy you never had ICP treatment