I can make anybody pretty I can make you believe any lie I can make you pick a fight With somebody twice Your size Well I've been known to cause a few breakups And I've been known to cause a few births I can make you new friends Or get you fired from work. And since the day I left Milwaukee Lyncheburg Bordeaux, France Been making the bars With lots of big money And helping white people dance I got you in trouble in high school And college now that was a ball You had some of the best times You'll never remember with me Alcohol, alcohol I got blamed at your wedding reception For your best man's embarra**ing speech And also for those naked pictures of you at the beach I've influenced kings and world leaders I helped Hemingway write like he did And I'll bet you a drink or two that I can make you Put that lampshade on your head And since the day I left Milwaukee Lyncheburg Bordeaux, France Been making a fool out of folks Just like you And helping white people dance I am medicine and I am poison I can help you up or make you fall You had some of the best times You'll never remember with me Alcohol, alcohol And since the day I left Milwaukee Lyncheburg Bordeaux, France Been making the bars With lots of big money And helping white people dance I got you in trouble in high school And college now that was a ball You had some of the best times You'll never remember with me Alcohol, alcohol