Bo Burnham - Can't Handle This (Kanye Rant) lyrics

Can I say my sh**? (*Name of town*) Can I say my sh**? I've got lots of sh** to say I've got lots of sh** to say I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can I have a huge amount of trouble Fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can I can get my hand like four inches into the can But then I have to tilt the can into my mouth But then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can So they all go spilling onto my face What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small I'll say it again The diameter of Pringle cans is way too small Two radiuses of a Pringle can is way too small If you feel me, put your hands up Come on! If you feel me, put your hands up Look at all these hands that are way too big to fit inside of a Pringle can Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can You think you can, I know you can't, you think you can Pringles! Listen to the people, I am sure ninety percent of the complaint letters you get Are about the width of your cans Just make them wider I've overdone the Pringles thing, sorry I want to have a daughter I want to have a daughter So I can finally have someone around the house who can fit their hands In the Pringle can Yes, I'm still on the Pringle cans thing! Yeah! I'll move on, alright? But that is priority número uno I don't go to the gym Because I'm self-conscious about my body But I'm self-conscious about my body cause I don't go to the gym Irony can be painful That's a Catch-22 Let's do this! I went to Chipotle I went to Chipotle Got myself a chicken burrito I went down the line and I got all these ingredients And at the end of the line The guy tried to wrap the burrito But half of the sh** inside the burrito spilled out He still wrapped it I was like, dude you should have warned me! You're a burrito expert You should have told me halfway through! "Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here" Do you f**ing think I want a messy burrito? No one wants a messy burrito The whole appeal of the burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained Within the confines of the tortilla I wouldn't have gotten half of the sh** if I knew it wasn't gonna fit in the burrito! Alright? Look I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got Half of it Like, I'm okay with small mistakes If you've got no more chicken, I'll take pork But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit Man, I wouldn't have got half of it, like Half of it, like Half of it, like Half of it, like Half of it right now I think it's time I Think it's time, I think that we break it down Put the lotion in the basket I can sit here and pretend Like my biggest problems are Pringle cans, and burritos The truth is, my biggest problem's you I want to please you But I want to stay true to myself I want to give you the night out that you deserve But I want to say what I think And not care what you think about it Part of me loves you Part of me hates you Part of me needs you Part of me fears you And I don't think that I can handle this right now Handle this right now I don't think that I can handle this right now I don't think that I can handle this right now I don't think that I can handle this right now I don't think that I can handle this right now Look at them, they're just staring at me Like, "come and watch the Skinny kid with a steadily declining mental health And laugh as he attempts To give you what he cannot give himself I don't think that I can handle this right now I don't think that I can handle this right now They don't even know the half of this right now They don't even know the half of it But I know I'm not a doctor I'm a p**y, I put on a silly show So I should probably just shut up and do my job So here I go I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit I wouldn't have got half You can tell them anything if You just make it funny, make it rhyme And if they still don't understand you Then you run it one more time I don't think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) I don't think that I can handle this right now (Hoo!) If you think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) Right now (Haa!) Now Handle this right Handle this right Handle this right now Thank you, good night! I hope you're happy *mic drop*