Blossom Dearie - Napoleon lyrics

Napoleon's a pastry Bismarck is a herring Alexander's a crème de cocoa mixed with rum And Herbie Hoover is a vacu-um. Columbus is a Circle, and a day off Pershing is a Square, what a payoff Julius Caesar is just a salad on a shelf So, little brother, get wise to yourself. Life's a bowl of cherry pits, that's the way it is Play it big and it throws you for a loop Comes today we're great, Comes tomorrow we're tomato soup. Napoleon's a pastry Get this under your brow: What once used to be a rooster Is just a duster now. DuBarry is a lipstick Pompadour's a hairdo Good Queen Mary just floats along from pier to pier; Venus de Milo's just a pink bra**iere. Sir Gladstone is a bag - ain't it shocking, And the mighty Kaiser's just a stocking, Czar of Russia is now caviar, And Cleopatra is a black cigar. Yes my honey lamb, Swift is just a ham, Lincoln's a tunnel, Coolidge is a dam; Yes my noble lad, comes today we're fads, Comes tomorrow we're subway ads. Homer is a swa-at Get this under your brow: All these big-wheel controversials are just commercials now. Better get your jug of wine and loaf of bread before that final bow.