Billy Connolly - Sergeant, Where's Mine? lyrics

I'm lyin' in bed, I'm in room twenty-six Thinkin' on things that I've done Like drinkin' wi' squaddies and bullin' my boots I'm countin' the medals I've won These hospital wards they're all drab lookin' joints But the ceiling's as much as I see It could do with a wee touch of paper or paint But then again, maybe that's me Chorus: Oh sergeant, is this the adventure you meant When I put my name down on the line All that talk of computers and sunshine and skis Oh, I'm askin' you, sergeant, where's mine I've a brother in Glasgow wi' long, curly hair When I joined up he said I was daft He says shootin' strangers just is nae his game That brother of mine is nae saft But I can put up wi' most things I've done in the time I can even put up with the pains But what do you do with a gun in your hand When you're faced with a hundred odd wanes