Bill Hicks - Chicks Dig Jerks lyrics

Oh, man Oh, Hitler had Eva Braun Manson had Squeaky Fromme Ted Bundy got lots of dates I wonder what I'm doing wrong I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks, yeah Well, if I meet one more single mom Whose true love is up and gone Tells me on her trailer porch 'Bout that man, still carries a torch Sure, he came home drunk each night Beat the kids and her in a fight But man, she loves him so! It's so hard to let him go, oww Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks Well, I'm sure there's some out there can relate Take the young man without a date See some jerk, some fine fine babe Drivin' away, oww Well, is that a new bruise you got on you? What does it say, that he loves you? Sure, he beats you, but afterwards he cries Oh baby, I could die Honey, I don't think that's nothin' to be proud of I think it's called alcoholism I don't think you should move away Stay with him 'til you're in your grave, yeah "You're so sweet." "Can't we just be friends?" "I think of you as a brother." "Awwww, man." Ow. Ow. You're hurtin' me Ow. Ow What do I have to offer you, baby? Poetry and true love That's not enough, I know for sure You need someone to throw you through the door Well, I don't pretend to understand women's little quirks Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks, oww Yeah Chicks dig jerks, so true Tell you man, be mean to 'em, man They'll never leave you then 'Cause chicks dig jerks Just ignore 'em, act like they're not there Man, you're gonna be pullin' chicks out of your hair They love that Whoo! Act like you don't care Oh, look at 'em everywhere! They come runnin' Whoo! Tired of bein' a good guy Such a lonely life I'm gonna be a jerk! Yeah, that's right! I'm gonna step on lots of toes Whoo! Girls gonna go crazy for that guy Baby, I'mma act like I don't even know you Whoo! Not gonna return one of your calls! Ho! I hear her, she's already at the door, man She's intrigued by my indifference! Whoo! I'm a jerk! And it's working out