Basement Beats - Feel It In The Air lyrics

You know, change is inevitable For better, for worse, is up to you Here's my experience: I wake up and vomit as another day begins Take a gander in the mirror decrepit, and majorly thin I promenade to this trap house Puttin' any and everything in my stystem 'till I blackout I take my life and I put them in these songs Caught another case and yes I'm out on bond I'm tired of these cops Tired of these constables Sick of these consequences Sick of these obstacoles So I'm a slave, handcuffed to this substance I need to quit, decomposing with reluctance Busted, disgusted, and can't be trusted Think what you want, my paintbrush will discuss this I dream of living lide, that's so beautiful and lustrous I'm never fitting in, I'm on the edge of the circumference With all these wrong decisions, I will never get ahead Glance at the newspaper, the obituary read: "He was an honor student, such a gentleman" "He got good grades and was so intelligent And when he spoke it was so spectacular" "Every lady loved him, he was something like a bachelor And when he talked people listened" "They seen he never judged and they respected his opinions And every gambit was a calculated chess move He had that formula that swirled in that test tube" "Had tons of friends, his group the best crew" "But he was feeling overwhelmed and overtime the stress grew" "Got job offers for a hundred grand a year" "Had the world by the balls, but he couldn't handle fear" "He stuck a gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger" "He left behind a sister and a mother that truly loved him" I can relate... I just never pulled the trigger We're both on the verge of d**h, he just did it quicker I can relate... I just never pulled the trigger I can relate... I just never pulled the trigger I look up and see repulsion in the mirror Covered in filth, guilt and shame, now eyes dropping a tear From this moment forward I am gonna change my life Now I can keep doing the same but too broke to pay the price Brake the pipe, shaking, anxious, no more chasing white And every wrong I ver did I'm gonna make it right I did, that was then, this is now... So please pay attention cause I'm gonna jump around I rap about this stuff because the sh** is so real And I talk about my life cause I'm still f**ing crazy... So insane, I must admit that I'm still so insane See the sh** is so deep Has anybody here felt like using? "Yeah" "I felt like using... felt like using a pistol" Benzos, barbiturated, sh** I got a fistful We have separate journeys but the pain is identical My lyrics hotter than a Playboy centerfold I try to practice three things that are indispensable To get confortable it's gonna take longer I don't dwell on sh**, see it just makes me stronger Every opportunity that I was given I f**ed them all up from the way that I was living I verbalize realism, I'm far from synthetic For all of my successes don't give myself enough credit And I remember the day the I had my first overdose Cope with the coke and potent dope left me comatose I was stranded with colossal affairs My mother smiles, no more disappointing stares I see a future, no more voicing my despair You're God damn right, I f**ing feel it in the air Listen, the smell of crack snoke lingers in the kitchen Hear the suction of the plunger when the finger are in position Cigarette burns, in every pair of shorts I would do coke for hours, then just stare at the door Paranoia sets in, I lost direction No time for resting 'till the day I get arrested So I'm stuck between rock and a hard place The main reason that I'm still breathing is God's grace I'm grateful for every fan and I'm blessed Watch friends relapse and I'll be damned if I'm next Get deeper, more honest with every chance to reflect Look, I never thought I'd put my hands on my ex But I did, what the f** I salute my short comings Say to myself: What am I becoming? You can judge me 'till your perspective gets clear And you can criticize my life, but I'll always perservere I'm liable of anything and yes, I accept that And anytime I fall short it's just a minor set back I had to cut ties, I had to step back Was homicidal man, I'm just being honest I'm modest, not arrogant nor pompous I used to brake the law and my shadow was my accomplice And I could take a f**ing hundred shots at her But I won't cause I'm not that type of man Slice my hand, when the pen is a sword with morbid moves Pernicious obsceneties strenghted my fortitude I keep my mouth shut as I plot to adapt I don't listen to the words that are talked behind my back I appreciate God and everything he's done for me I don't judge cause I understand your story Relate and identify, I cherish the troubles I'm still alive, it's a privilege to struggle Used to always have a half gallon in the trunk Look, I can't front son, it's been a rough month Rest in peace Jen Zekas, you were loved by so many Your viewing helped me looking at myself Calamities and losses are always ending tragic A million times I seen myself laying inside a casket My sister's tears, they fall and hit the coffin My mother's hysterical, OK I'll switch topics I switch topics, it's kinda touchy Kinda the wrong subject that I should be displaying I'm reminiscing on the first time that I stepped inside the booth I was scared, timid and shy to tell you the truth I couldn't tell you about my life through these private raps But then I started one day and I ain't ever look back For no reason, just beacuse I feel worthless A lot of days I still feel lost without a purpose I'm the type of man that listens 'till it's too late But what I have see they call it true faith And this song goes out to anyone that lost a loved one I know it's hard, but we keep pushing forward It hurts my hearth knowing that she runs the streets I fall to my knees, start to cry, I feel weak Powerless attacked by tremendoud grievance We can only carry the message, can't determine who receives it So understand where the f** am I coming from No one has to die, f** the feelings that you feel You gotta trust the images, that problems bring gifts With God I am strong, the tenacity is thick I idolize anyone that fights to chase their dreams I can't do this sh** myself so I must embrace my team When I pray I live everyday free I rap for the ones that can't get and stay clean