Atena - Exorcist lyrics

As the screen lights up the cold dark nights As messengers begging me not to leave This world by my own hands Though I never mentioned no such thing to anyone As I never truly gave it any thought my self The screen fights the darkness around me and in me Through the night I'm not alone It's not so bad It just can't be I'm still alive But my heart is rushing, I'm struggling, trying 'Cause my mind just told my heart That I'm dying Ghost pain running through the spine and my mind What will it feel like when will it end? How long till I have to face this again? What will it look like when will it end? How long will it last? I can't get up and they don't get it I'm so imbalanced they just won't get it They just can't see it They just can't feel it I'm so imbalanced My own little secret The bitterness is eating me up inside, when I'm alone, I try believing in my own lies, it never works I'll take it out on myself once more Its self-destructive self-deception The bitterness is eating me up inside, when I'm alone, I try believing in my own lies, it never works I'll take it out on myself once more Its self-destructive self-deception I'm just as broken As everyone else When my mind poisons my blood, that's what I tell myself I'm not okay will there ever be a way To numb this pain in a peaceful way? I'm too scared I'm too scared to live Looking back because the future doesn't have a place for me I'm not alone It's not so bad It just can't be Cause I'm still alive But my heart is rushing, I'm struggling, trying 'Cause my mind just told my heart That I'm dying I'm not afraid because the reaper pa**ed me down Along his field of work When he ever was so young He never did agree, and only said to me You're just not qualified for d**h