Andrew Lloyd Webber - Mungojerrie And Rumpleteazer lyrics

Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer we're a notorious couple of cats As knockabout clowns, quick - change comedians Tight - rope walkers and acrobats We have an extensive reputation, we make our home in Victoria Grove This is merely our center of operation for we are incurably given to rove If the area window was found ajar and the basement looked like a field of war If a tile or two came loose on the roof which presently failed to be waterproof If the drawers were pulled out from the bedroom chests And you couldn't find one of your winter vests Or after supper one of the girls suddenly missed her Woolworth pearls Then the family would say, "It's that horrible cat! It was Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!" And most of the time they left it at that Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have an unusual gift of the gab We are highly efficient cat burglars as well And remarkably smart at a smash and grab We make our home in Victoria Grove, we have no regular occupation We are plausible fellows who liked to engage a friendly policeman in conversation When the family a**embled for Sunday dinner Their minds made up that they won't get thinner on Argentine joint, potatoes and greens Then the cook would appear from behind the scenes And say in a voice that was broken with sorrow "I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow The joint has gone from the oven like that!" Then the family would say, "It's that horrible cat! Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!" And most of the time they left it at that Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have a wonderful way of working together And some of the time you would say it was luck and some of the time you would say it was weather We go through the house like a hurricane and no sober person could take his oath Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer? Or could you have sworn that it might have been both? When you heard a dining room smash or up from the pantry there came a loud crash Or down from the library came a loud ping From a vase which was commonly said to be Ming Then the family would say: "Now which was which cat? It was Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer And there's nothing at all to be done about that"