I'm in here climbing up a train that's falling off of a cliff
And i'm gunning down evil creatures that do not exist
I'm out here balancing a walking glove on top of a ball
Meanwhile i'm having a swordfight with the president of federal hall
If you clip me in a dream it will be your final fantasy forever will you sleep
Like you max payne's family
I'm serving up headshots like a favorite dish
Because my mouse pad is lift, pimping the rainbow wish
Confronted by a s**er who had claimed his name was Ganon
Told him "I don't care" and introduced him to the cannon
Couldn't lose the cops on the ground
So i jacked a plane
Airforce chasing me
While i'm sipping champagne
(beatbox solo)
Doc man be honest
Is my rap career gonna be okay?
Welp, I got some bad news
It's a lieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
(ba** drops)
Recognize me? I'm the man whom arose from a burnt sea
With a implant childhood memory
Of me playing DK country
Back when we had 4:3 tv's
Pagers and tamagotchis
We still had men over seas
It is our nations disease
And we could cut a lot of taxes if I kilt 'em for free
I'm the man who you send to the frontlines
While the generals will expect him to blow mines
And i pick off all the combine
With my right hand while my left hand in the dungeon with the design that will define all the people who are like me that will live life on the inside (ah)
I save the world on a dime
I'm in here stopping these crimes
I'm in here drinking a combination of lemon and lime
And now i got a microphone, and i am making it rhyme
And you will never see my face upon the cover of Time (tm)
You won't see this on Atari
I'm on a k**ing safari
And they're making me laugh
Like they Jon Jafari
They say that dunkey's got bars
They say my verses go hard
Because the last paragraph appears on your funeral card
(explosion)