So my hair is sorta thinning and a colour's been applied;
And, yeah, O.K, about the paunch - I guess I sorta lied;
But you won't hear me whining like those f**ing teeny stars
When I'm standing at the mirror and I'm playing air guitar.
Rock and roll is music for the angry and depraved -
So you can't really rock and roll till you're middle aged.
Moaning, between head jobs, rock stars say they're so depressed -
They should try out a real job and a boss that's not impressed;
If it's so f**ing hard being young, beautiful and rich
Come on down the office, co*khead, I'd be glad for us to switch:
The Prodigy despise normal men; Keith studded his own tongue;
But the pain of that don't compare to actually being one.
Oooh, it must be so f**ing hard for all the Trainspotting crew
To have to live an alienated life in the proletariat milieu,
While all us normal middle cla** wa*ker types are trying
Not to have such a great time working 40 years then dying;
Every f**ing adolescent moans about how they're so deprived -
What do you f**ing think it's like turning forty five?
"Oh no!" I say to the wife, "another album's due;
Another tour of the world - oh, what am I going to do?
Oh, it's such a ha**le - the fans just won't leave me alone -
Remember those great old days with three kids and a loan?
Can't go to Safeways, got a photo shoot, and I'm stoned.
By the way, nearly forgot - Madonna phoned."
Hey, who doesn't wanna rock all day and party every night?
Every adult's a boring turd - that's exactly f**ing right.
You'll never join the normal world, says your anguished teenage voice:
Well I don't ever remember someone giving me the choice.
So you can sing about rebellion and experiment with drug bingeing
But you won't get really angry till your teenage kids start whingeing.