Drugs are f**ing fun, pal:
Factor that f**ing in
To your Drug O-f**ing-fensive
Type health f**ing warnin'.
There ain't a lot that's fun, pal:
Old age, and school, and dreams
Of a life that will never be;
Sexless nights; wasted schemes;
Your horizon still receding,
Speeding hope that's fruitless;
A sudden cliff; and skidding;
Then descent to twisted rest.
The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Serene and total peace.
I could'a stayed at home, pal,
And lived a joyless life -
But where the f**'s the fun in that?
Superannuation, wife -
The whole f**ing package?!
For me, it never suited.
A softco*k life and limp d**h?
Go get f**ing rooted!
There might be fun in poetry,
And art, and bein' literate;
It never hit the spot for me,
Nor you, though you won't admit to it.
The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Hear the distant gong beat.
You say you got a Ph D?
Well, good for you, my son.
How smart you f**ing need to be
To work out that d** are fun?
Have a f**ing bash, pal -
Take this suspect load
And give to a mate of mine,
Lives on the Pat Pong Road.
You ever felt the warming waves
In the Gulf of old Siam?
Ever wanted to ever be
A different f**ing man?
The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Foil parcels in my teeth.
You need to hear the Mekong flood -
It's an awesome f**ing sound.
Take this package - quickly pal,
They've come to chain me down.
They bolt me to a concrete floor -
Don't get all moral, son:
There's sixty of us goes in here,
We all think d** are fun.
50 years in a Thailand hell -
20 grams of smack up my arse.
Why? Cos d** are f**in' fun:
Why the f** you need to ask?
The Sacred Temple of the Emerald Buddha -
Did a deal at the fat guy's feet.