Twenty one and one-half years ago
I woke up crying in suburban Baltimore
Some f**er kicked me out the door
Three and three-fourth years ago
I wandered home and woke up sighing
Everything was different
All the people were confiding in me
Every now and again
I go back to where it all began
I kind of wish I didn't
But I like to see my friends
Oh, Baltimore!
You make me smile
You make me happy
We'll be together in a while
When I was a kid
The proudest I had ever been
Was when I didn't hit my sister
For a several hour stint
When I cleaned the carpet
With a bottle of shampoo
I didn't want to get in trouble
I just wanted to clean you
Because everybody knows
That you're a dirty f**ing town
But I've got memories
That keep me coming back just for another round
Oh, Baltimore!
You make me smile
You make me happy
We'll be together in a while
Oh, Baltimore!
You make me smile
You make me happy
We'll be together in a while
Oh, Baltimore!
You make me smile
You make me happy
We'll be together in a while