Chorus: (Alternating)
You look a little lost, kid
You look a little scared
You seem a little worried, kid
A little unprepared
You seem a little flaccid, kid
It seems you've lost your wood
Did you come here alone, kid?
You look misunderstood
Weenie:
Lemme guess:
Your masters gone astray?
No one around to sit and play?
No one to make you spurt and spray?
Well, todays your lucky day
There's a warm, secluded place
Where a dick can feel at home!
With miles of open space
Where dicks are free to roam!
Got no time for your selfish owner
He sure missed out on a quality bo*er
Don't worry you'll get your kicks 'cause
You just stumbled into the land of the dicks!
You can let your hair grow out
There's nobody to make you trim!
You can flop or go kerplop
When you're everybody's favorite limb
You don't need to get total action
When you've got scrotal satisfaction
You can come anytime and get your fix
At a hot little joint called the land of the dicks!
Chorus:
A hot little joint called the land of the dicks!
(Dialogue)
Big T:
co*ks from far and wide
Oh, they lay down at my side
I take them in, and wipe their tears away
You may be lost now, Dick
But you're one lucky prick
We'll make a one-eyed king of you today!
Chorus: (Alternating)
Some are big, and some are small
Some are slobs, and some well dressed
There are dicks of every kind
It's a regular sausage fest
You have miles at your disposal if you wanna go pissin'
The golden rain flows as you watch it glisten
You can come anytime and get your fix
At a hot little joint called the land of the dicks!
Big T: (Chorus:)
I said pee-pee...
(Pee-pee...)
I said ding dong...
(Ding dong...)
Me tallywacker...
(You tallywacker...)
Schloong...
(Schloong...)
I said trouser snake...
(Trouser snake...)
Private eye...
(Private eye...)
Wing dang doodle...
(Wing dang doodle...)
Chorus: (Alternating)
Sausage!
Choade!
co*k!
Dick:
Dick!
All:
Dick!
(Instrumental)
All:
Foreskin, no skin, everyone's in!
There's a warm, secluded place
Where a dick can feel at home!
With miles of open space
Where dicks are free to roam!
Got no time for your selfish owner
He sure missed out on a quality bo*er
Don't worry you'll get your kicks...
You can come and get your fix...
It's time to mingle and mix 'cause
You just stumbled in to the land of the dicks!