[Chorus: A.Swiss]
I put my dick in her bu*t
I said yo b**h what's up
She said I'm calling the cops
I said no you're not s*ut
She tried pepper spray
But it only made me horny
I said I'm gunna get laid
Whether consensual or rape
[Verse 1: A.Swiss]
I'm not a one girl man
Won't f** the same b**h again
If she tries hitting me up
Ill f**ing block her like spam
JK, On Facebook I creep
I f** hoes in their sleep
I tape their mouths shut
So they don't make a peep
I get s** when I want it
Too many s** dolls got hundreds
Whenever I get anywhere near a girl her s** drive just plummets
I chill near the girl's locker room
Pretend to sweep with a broom
I sneak inside, lock the door and jack off to young poon
I sweat around women cuz they can tell when I'm fibbin'
Like when they ask how big it is I lie sayin' 5 inches
I see a girl at a bar so I sit at her table
But Im so nervous that I twitch and stutter like I'm disabled
The days of masturbating will never f**in end
And this is why binoculars are my best friend
The zoom on them is so good on em', I'd rate them a 10 out uh 10
What's that noise? Oh f** the cops are knocking again
[Chorus: T-Breezy]
[Verse 2: T-Breezy]
Had this girl named Shaki
She let me cum in her eye
Came so much in that eye dat b**h couldn't even cry
Broke in her dorm I'm not a first time offenda
Last time I got caught had to hire a public defenda
Wiped my dick on her pillow
And Made 10 copies of her agenda
(You call it stalking, but I call it commitment)
7:45
Outside her window I hide
Then right around 8
Is when my lover awakes
9:02 every day I follow her to Starbucks
The way she sips on that coffee you know she's trying to get f**ed
From Starbucks to cla**
It takes her 42 steps
And the whole dam time I'm snapping pics of that a**
From 10 to 2 I don't know what to do
I usually call in a bomb threat to get her outta that room
At 3 o'clock
Looks like she's begging for co*k
She must be waiting for me cuz her front doors unlocked
SHOWER TIME! Every day at 5
Haven't missed one session since f**in 05'
But tonight at 8 someone picked her up for date
I watched as they hugged, she just sealed her fate
She got dropped off at ten
Finally alone again
Kicked in the door and dragged her into the kitchen
And then…
[Chorus: Big Tony]
[Chorus: A.Swiss]
[Verse 3: Big Tony]
Walking through the halls, I see the girl of my dreams
I try to say hi, but all I hear are her screams
Am I really that ugly? My mom says I'm cute
Did I fart or something? I didn't feel a toot
I'll try again tomorrow, maybe I'll have better luck
If we go on a date, I'll take my daddy's truck
So I put on my jean shorts and I tucked in my shirt
Finished my juice box and now I'm ready to flirt
I walked up to her with my head held high
Told her she was cute, but then she let out a sigh
She said that I was really weird and that I smelled like aged cheese
I forgot my inhaler, so I let out a wheeze
I started to cry and pa**ed out in the halls
Then I woke up with an open zipper and out were my balls
Everybody was laughing and I started to cry
So I sprinted straight home and I asked myself why
[Chorus: A.Swiss, T-Breezy, Big Tony]
A.Swiss: You think she'll take me back? She still loves me right? AHHHH
[Outro: A.Swiss, T-Breezy, Big Tony]