Pro life, pro choice, beauty queens Liquid Clorox, feminine hygiene Coca Cola, Tarter toothpaste Dial this number, slap it on my face Perfect placement, highway ditch And useless products, that's my niche I, the billboard Pitching God-knows-what The billboard, cheap space I'm a freeway s*ut Granddad of the discount ad I've sold indoor tanning, Campbell's soup Funeral caskets, p**no flicks and Fruit Loops Garden Weasels, ceiling fans Fireworks and alcohol, fake hair for the balding man
On a billboard Pitching God-knows-what The billboard, cheap space I'm a freeway s*ut Granddad of the discount ad Be wise, advertise There's ads for famous churches, topless bars Homeless shelters, missing kids and rock stars Fast food and 3.2 beer, next filling station I see the culture, I see one nation On a billboard Pitching God-knows-what The billboard, cheap space I'm a freeway s*ut Granddad of the discount ad Be wise, advertise