[Verse 1] The first boy I kissed was in a close friend's pool A bet from the boys, thank God he pulled through He got thumps on the back, I felt uneasy with that And walked home, touching my lips like a bruise The first guy I let touch my skin with more than his eyes Left her with ghosts I still speak to at night That say I wasn't strong enough for what I thought was tough love And years later, I learned it wasn't fine [Verse 2] I used to love the way all choirs sound But something about them's different now See, the church, it just claims too many these days My friends' livеs were worth less than thеir gowns
Being judged from the pews through stained-glass art At my faith flailing like a flag at half-mast But with young boys unsafe and the unjust ordained I won't pray to dusty pages of the past [Verse 3] I'd like to believe there's more than just us I'm an atheist who enjoys the stars Not the ones in magazines my mother reads but never keeps Sometimes, I mumble prayers in my sleep I used to be scared of midnight silhouettes That my coat rack was a murderer standing by my bed But these days, I'm so lonely, instead of a scream I'd probably ask him to hold me instead