I used to be the loneliest guy in town Couldn't find a girl Till one day I took my troubles down to Madam Broom You know that gypsy with a goat cap too She's got a pad down on thirty fourth and vine Selling little bottles of love potion number nine I told her that I was a flop with chicks It's been that way since nineteen fifty six She jumped down turned around and made a magic sign And handed me a bottle of love potion number nine She jumped down turned around and gave me a wink She said I'm going to mix it up right here in the sink It smelled like turpentine and looked like India ink
I held my nose I closed my eyes I took a drink I didn't know if it was day or night I started kissing everything in sight But when I kissed a cop down on thirty fourth and vine It broke my little bottle of love potion number nine Here you are, son, don't be afraid, just drink this, drink it all now So I closed my eyes I held my nose I took a drink I didn't know if it was day or night I started kissing everything in sight But when I kissed a cop down on thirty fourth and vine It broke my little bottle of love potion number nine Love potion number nine Love potion number nine