I woke up in the morning with you wrapped inside my arms
Last night the tent got cold so we just snuggled to keep warm
I must admit that you had started feeling pretty good
And I was feeling you a little better than I should
Must've been drunk
For us to carry on this way
You don't talk like Mister Rogers
I don't look like Doris Day
Now maybe it's the wine and weed
That made us act so queer
Or maybe h*mos**uals have bottled up this beer
My girlfriend she's suspicious, she must know there's something wrong
'Cause ever since that night my need for her is twice as strong
And we've avoided sleeping out or wrestling since then
But deep inside I feel this need to hold you once again
Must've been drunk
For us to carry on this way
We don't have the right equipment
For the games we seem to play
Now maybe it's the wine and weed
That made us act so queer
Or maybe h*mos**uals have bottled up this beer
Now you have long been married and you've even got a kid
And you swear your wife feels better than your buddies ever did
But me, I've found the flaw in our old denial game
I've slept with men cold sober and it feels good just the same
Must've been drunk
For us to carry on this way
I swear God wouldn't let a former altar boy be gay
Now maybe it's the wine and weed
That made us act so queer
Or maybe h*mos**uals have bottled up this beer