I think penises are wonderful
I like to play with them
Masturbation is loads of fun
And so is loving other men
Watch them grow before your eyes
Lie back and watch them shrink
They can do a lot of things
But don't use them to think
Don't use your penis for a brain
Hard as it may be you really must refrain
'Cause it's meant to bring you pleasure
But it's bound to bring you pain
If you try to use your penis for a brain
Some men are always collecting things
Like sports cars, guns and knives
They seem to think of them
As masculine extensions of their size
Perhaps it makes them feel secure
Or smart or even tall
But that kind of macho reasoning
Can only screw us all
Don't use your penis for a brain
Hard as it may be you really must refrain
'Cause it's not a way to measure
Your power or your fame
So don't try to use your penis for a brain
Penises are fun but not intelligent
They have no IQ
Penises are cute but they're not logical
Don't let them make decisions for you
We've got a president who's so confused
He can't tell right from wrong
He thinks a missile is a "peace keeper"
And that weapons make us strong
But that kind of rationale
Will only make us dead
I wish that when he runs the country
He would use his other head
Don't use your penis for a brain
Hard as it may be you really must refrain
'Cause it's just a manly treasure
No it's not a gun to aim
So don't try to use your penis
You mus'nt try to use your penis
Please don't try to use your penis for a brain!