Today on Dublin's Leaky Corners, one of our undercover reporters recounts a verbal alteration that occurred at Barney Kiernan's. Our reporter's mission was to uncover to a smutty picture operation being run at Barney Kiernan's but what he found was more pernicious. For his protection, his identity has been concealed.
[Unknown starts talking] So bloody Christ himself was down at Barney Kiernan's today. Don't sn******g you basta'd on my mum I swear. It was that Bloom fellow. Gave us all Sermon on the Mount. Funny comin' from a fellow who doesn't do much mounting lately. My hands are clean, is what the tongues are saying. Any who, so the Jew-Christ starts saying Ireland should be sober, ‘magine that, Ireland sober—it's easier to teach an a** to talk, though who knows, an a** did preach today. God above can that man jabber. Legend says he outtalked his reflection once. Good ole Citizen was there today though. Ready to set Bloom straight before he devoured us all with his cunning. Threw a few verbal jabs at him by declaring that a dishonored wife was the reason Ireland's in the gutterhole. Says a dishonored wife let in all the foreigners. Bit of the anti-Semite, the Citizen, I am not one of myself, swear on my mum...but you never know with these Jews. They have the gall to declare themselves part of this nation, just because they're living here. Citizen couldn't stand that, had to spit to the side—he did it for all of us. Then it got really weird, somethin' somethin' about persecution, about plundered culture, about injustice —was he talking about the Jews or Ireland? Who knows? The rotter left but came back. He never once bought us drinks. He left with the Martin Cunningham fellow, good fellow that one, and so the Jew—I mean Bloom, I ain't no anti-Semite—turns and says that God himself was a Jew and so was Christ. Believe it. Believe it. Amen. Citizen wasn't have none of that. Was going to crucify the ba*tard with a biscuit box. But he got away. Slippery them Jews, but really I ain't got no problem with them. [Interview ends]
Marian Purefoy's seventh son was born today. It's definitely hers but is the other half her husband's? Join us tomorrow as Leaky Corners plunges deep into the wet worlds of Dublin's laundry women who swear in whispers that the man responsible is an exiled royal.