Imitation leather, pink naugahyde
Two-inch tear down the left-hand side
Came from my daddy's pocketknife, that wasn't my fault
Moved along with us everywhere we went
No matter where we lived it always fit in
Kind of like a next of kin
If that chair could talk
My little brother, Billy, broke his left hand
Jumping off the arm like Superman
With my grandma's old red afghan
Tied around his neck.
Where at least a thousand books were read
Our Siamese cat made it her bed
It even heard an "I thee wed"
When sister married in the living room
To that Phillips boy from just down the block
If that chair could talk
Mama bought it in a yard sale in '65
It was Daddy's favorite chair after he retired
Survived all that and a kitchen fire
Smoke stains rubbed right off
Where I spent a million hours talking on the phone
It was my favorite spot to polish my toes
Something Mama didn't know
If that chair could talk
From Leave It to Beaver to The Brady Bunch
Chicken noodle soup to Captain Crunch
TV dinners to Sunday lunch, and movies late at night
Brother tippin' me backward until I screamed
He'd get in trouble for being so mean
And when he told Mama he'd joined the Marines
It's where she sat down in shock
The good, the bad, it's seen it all
If that chair could talk
It caught my tears, held me up when I felt bad
It calmed my fears, it's good to have a friend like that
It hid the ice cream money for hot summer days
Listened while I practiced for my high school plays
And all the times it heard me pray
When things were going rough
It's where Bobby Baker gave me my first kiss
Mama came in and nearly had a fit
There's footprints of my life all over it
We've been through a lot
The good, the bad, it's seen it all
If that chair could talk.