Wake up every morning wishing I wasn't me
Riding my bike, forgot the lock now my bike is free
Moved here because my mom wanted a better life for me
Head bu*ted in the face now I'm icing dying teeth
And the parents asking “When did kids become so violent?”
That's what happens when you're put in a hostile environment
I remember making lists in my head
Of all the kids that I truly wanted dead
It's these types of thoughts that scare people the most
Because a normal kid shouldn't think so demented and gross
You can't help it when you're pushed too much
You eat in the bathroom stall everyday for lunch
Wanting to have one friend who won't make fun
But they continue and you question turning a gun
Onto yourself, suicide really was contemplated
How could it not? They called you f*g and you felt truly hated
Stop showing up to school because of the reasons stated
Instead I laid in my bed so I wouldn't be berated
But now I'm Jaded like Will Smith when he got married
Forced to read books like “The Things That They Carried”
The things I carried, I'd call them burdens
Had a nightmare before Christmas, Tim Burton
My best friend and his family died on their way to Mexico
And just like that our memories were the first to go
I still regret what I said before he went
We had our disagreements and I needed to vent
I told you off, now I wish that we could circumvent
Now I'm at your funeral and all I feel is the need to repent
I'm sorry, I'll say it a thousand times over
Lookin in the cracks for a four leaf clover
But there's no luck, just this chip on my shoulder
Sorry, again I sound so angsty
I'm just a clown with some darkness like Gacy
No one's gonna read this, but that doesn't phase me
I'm waiting for a magnolia to come and save me
But I'm lonely on this island, So I'm ghost like Swayze