I remember as if it were a meal ago
Said, Tommy the Cat as he reeled back to clear
Whatever foreign matter may have nestled its way into his mighty throat
Many a fat alley rat had met its demise
While staring point blank down the cavernous barrel
Of this awesome prowling machine
Truly a wonder of nature this urban predator
Tommy the cat had many a story to tell
But it was a rare occasion such as this that he did
She came slidin' down the alleyway
Like bu*ter drippin' off a hot biscuit
The aroma, the mean scent, was enough
To arouse suspicion in even the oldest of
Tigers that hung around the hot spot in those days
The sight was beyond belief
Many a head snapped for double even triple
Takes as this vivacious feline made her
Her way into the delta of the alleyway
Where the most virile of the young
Tabbys were known to hang out
They hung in droves
Such a multitude of masculinity
Could only be found in one place
And that was O'malley's Alley
The air was thick with cat calls
(No pun intended)
But not even a muscle in her neck did twitch
As she sauntered up into the heart of the alley
She knew what she wanted
She was lookin' for that stud bull, the he cat
And that was me
Tommy the Cat is my name and I say unto thee
Say baby, "Do you wanna lay down by me?"