I have known you both now it seems for so long I can't get you together so I've written you a song Take it as you please with a frown or with a smile Or think about it for a while You're still fighting an old, old war You just keep on picking the same sore First I hear one story like it's the cold hard facts Then I hear the other say 'No, it was never like that' One day I'm a doctor, the next day I'm a guide And you 'both want me to take sides You're still fighting a cold, cold war And you just keep on picking the same sore No matter what I do I know that I can't win
He says 'What'd she say?' then she says 'What'd you hear from him?' And neither one of you will ever take the blame You both should be ashamed When you first met you were just like kids in a candy store Now you both keep picking the same sore I think I'll get together all your friends and me And we'll buy a boat and send you off to sea And you can sail that ship to a far off distant shore And keep on fighting evermore And there'll be no one there for you to bore And you can both keep picking the same sore